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Hidden Bad Credit History = Divorce

posted 3/8/2009 4:51:44 PM |
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  casuallylooking


I was doing some reading online earlier this morning and I came upon an article about a man who divorced his wife of less than a month,because she had really bad credit and never told him about it prior to being married. He found out when he tried to put her on his credit cards.
(so much for the part about for better or worse, for richer or poorer.)

There were some comments on this article and someone suggested it should be possible for people to find out a potential mates credit history and scores before they start dating them. A few people agreed that would be ideal....

Now I agree it's important to know your s/o's credit scores and such at a certain point. Especially if it appears you are going in the direction of living together or getting married...But BEFORE you start dating them?!?
My opinion is, besides it not being anyone elses business at that point, it would also be a violation of privacy. Legally or not.

Would you only date someone who had really good/excellent credit?
Would you refuse to date anyone you really liked because they had bad credit?

If you could,would you check up on a person to find out about their credit?
At what point do you think a persons credit history becomes the other persons business? Or do you?

Would you let someone you just started to date or are considering dating check your credit history and scores?

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Comments:

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surv6969

Mar 8 @ 5:10PM  
no that is shallow.
no also shallow.
no not my business.
once you start living together or talking marriage.
no none of the business yet.
Wordsofwit

online now!
Mar 8 @ 5:13PM  
Let me tell you about Texas. If you marry somebody in this state, you inherit their credit and creditors going after money from debts accrued by the spouse before the marriage can go after you.
1bunny629

Mar 8 @ 5:13PM  
I am an open book. I don't think anyone should have access to my personal information till we have gotten to the point where we would consider taking care of one another financially. I would discuss my credit and funds status with someone I care about. There is no reason to lie to someone your not trying to impress. really no reason to lie to anyone. I have always been upfront about who I am and what I have to offer. If it doesn't fit their wants or needs then at least they heard it from me, instead of trying to investigate on their own and finding out I lied...what's the point. Honesty is the best policy.
Xien607

Mar 8 @ 5:34PM  
For me it is no ones business of what state of credit you are in until you are thinking of something substantial or marriage.

If 2 people are going to get involved and really care for each other then I think it is very important for all issues to be discussed.

I for myself would want the other person to know as much about me as possible so that we could begin a relationship of trust as I would lke to think the other person feels the same.

If either are hiding something of that nature then what does the word "Trust" hold for value?
casuallylooking

Mar 8 @ 5:36PM  
I had to read my blog to see what answers went to which questions, surv...lol

It's that way in Ohio too, Bruce. For a period of 7 years after the credit came into default.
So, are you saying you wouldn't date someone without knowing their history?

I completely agree with you,Murphy. I am who I am and I'm not going to lie to anyone to try and make myself look better. It all comes out eventually and then anything you had is part of that lie. If that person is not worth being honest with or wants more than I am, they're not the person I want to share my life with.
1bunny629

Mar 8 @ 5:39PM  
Right there with you Casual! No point. Never have been a lier. Sometimes my truth hurts, but I don't ever ask anyone to accept it.
Wordsofwit

online now!
Mar 8 @ 5:50PM  
It's that way in Ohio too, Bruce. For a period of 7 years after the credit came into default.
So, are you saying you wouldn't date someone without knowing their history?

Dating, no problem as most everybody I had dated had a credit problem to some degree, usually stemming from a divorce. Now, marrying somebody is something else again. It could be a very long engagement.

I am just shooting in the dark here, but what could be the work around is to have the person with the shitty credit file for bankruptcy before getting married.
casuallylooking

Mar 8 @ 6:37PM  
but what could be the work around is to have the person with the shitty credit file for bankruptcy before getting married.

I imagine quite a few people probably do that. But it still follows their credit record and in some states effects the new spouses credit score. Although no creditors can file any liens or garnishments against the spouse then.
Problem is, with some people, they just don't know how to quite going into debt or how to pay their bills even when they have the money. They just don't care.

Unfortunately, divorce becomes a negative financial factor for many.

It could be a very long engagement.
yeap..... I would think most people would understand that.
Sunshine79

Mar 8 @ 10:44PM  
Now I agree it's important to know your s/o's credit scores and such at a certain point. Especially if it appears you are going in the direction of living together or getting married...But BEFORE you start dating them?!?
My opinion is, besides it not being anyone elses business at that point, it would also be a violation of privacy. Legally or not.

I totally agree!
partytimemary

Mar 8 @ 10:55PM  
I don't think this should even be an issue unless marriage is in the immediate future. I would stand on my own... thanks. Always have, always will. Maybe I don't have the most perfect credit, economy has sucked bad this last year or two...but I pay my bills, expect no one else to nor would I consider dating or being with someone who could pass judgement so easily against another person.

I really can't see where it's anyone's business until things are in formation for co-habitation. Geeeze,, if I had known half of the men's credit or lack there of, before I dated them.. I'd have spent alot more years single.... anyway, that is pretty shallow and I wouldn't base whether or not I could like someone on their past.... period.

Unless he was an axe murderer,,,that could change my tune!

Good blog tho' kudos!
onehornytoad69

Mar 9 @ 12:29AM  
Would you only date someone who had really good/excellent credit?
Would you refuse to date anyone you really liked because they had bad credit?

If you could,would you check up on a person to find out about their credit?
At what point do you think a persons credit history becomes the other persons business? Or do you?

Would you let someone you just started to date or are considering dating check your credit history and scores

no
no
no
never
im an open book, just ask
I went thru the "divorce" thingy and took the bills with me
Lessons learned!
Wordsofwit

online now!
Mar 9 @ 12:30AM  
if I had known half of the men's credit or lack there of, before I dated them.. I'd have spent alot more years single

There ya go! Better safe than sorry.
Lisa46

Mar 9 @ 10:03AM  
I have experienced much diffilcuties lately does that make me a bad person?? No it don't so why would I judge someone else? I can care less about a persons credit he has a job that shows me alot.
straightup_9

Mar 9 @ 11:59AM  
It's a personal thing....Anyone who is serious about it, can run a credit check on anyone else, any time they choose....very easy to do....and very inexpensive.
So if this is a concern, then run the check BEFORE any relationship happens, otherwise just go with the flow.....

As to the premise of the story, I doubt the validity of him "discovering" her bad credit when he tried to "add" her to his credit card accounts....Since the credit is already established, all that is necessary is to request an additional card with her name on it.......

Perhaps he was trying to INCREASE his own credit standing by using HER credit to get a larger limit...which would have been the wrong reason to marry her in the first place.......Just sayin'
SleepingDreamer

Mar 15 @ 12:29AM  
lol. I make jokes with my husband I'm going to get a boyfriend with a low credit score and a past history of unemployment and felony convictions- basically, the "ideal" boyfriend. haha.

Hubby's credit is terrible and has been throughout the term of our relationship, my credit WAS perfect.. in the beginning. However, bad credit scores have a way of rubbing off on their partners because my mate has a history of VERY bad financial decision making skills and that has translated into him convincing me to make some poor decisions of my own.

People want to watch out for their assets and futures. They want to know they have a responsible partner (I use this loosely because some people have bad credit for no real fault of their own) that can get a house loan with them, that can be settled and stable, that can afford the particular amenities they can. They don't want a partner that piggybacks on their credit for things they can't afford or that cannot grasp the gravity of huge financial commitments.

It's personal preference, a lot of people think perfect credit translates into someone that is responsible and meticulous about their financial decisions. There's nothing wrong with that. If they're looking for a relationship with the "perfect" person they deserve their qualifications. To terminate a marriage due on a credit score isn't "wild", hell, people have divorced for a lot more lucrative or oddball reasons. It doesn't sound like he was very in love at all and he obviously didn't really think about the entirety of a commitment if he could just cancel it because of a bad credit score. Marriages aren't like canceling your magazine subscription so if he called it after a month than he didn't do his research beforehand.

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Hidden Bad Credit History = Divorce