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I used to try to be clever, but that never got me laid.

posted 2/10/2009 12:50:20 AM |
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tagged: sex, humor
  soonersoccer

Like I said, spending time on these posts trying to demonstrate that I had a personality didn't work, so now I just want some pussy. I want a girl to suck my dick, have sex with me, and let me cum all over her like she's a little whore. I have no standards since I'm depressed, desperate, and a little bit drunk. Seriously, someone sleep with me.

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Blogs by soonersoccer:
The meaning of life
The one where I complain about not having enough sex
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People from real states?
My thoughts on Valentine's Day
I used to try to be clever, but that never got me laid.
A poem I wrote about sex
You CAN have sex with my personality
Prove to me that you're a real person: a Turing test


Comments:

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lookingforsomefun152

Feb 10 @ 1:58AM  
Dude, if I were you I'd erase this blog before too many women see it, because that's never going to work. It's just going to make women think you have a low self esteem. Just being honest. So my best advice is erase this blog as quick as you can, so not a lot of women see it. Just look at my blogs, do you think I'm ever going to get laid on this site? Fuck no. But I don't care. I'm just on here to have fun.
soonersoccer

Feb 10 @ 2:25AM  
Haha, I doubt this will get me laid either (not that I would mind if it did). Hopefully some people will be able to see the underlying humor in the post and at least get a laugh out of it though.
casuallylooking

Feb 10 @ 2:29AM  
Yeah, you spent so much time showing that side of yourself...

As for your title, I doubt this will either.. But at least you're honest so good luck.
Wordsofwit

Feb 10 @ 5:18AM  
Trying to be funny and clever is one thing, being successful in the attempt quite another. I have to agree with the other commentators. If your teddy bear reads this, it will walk on you.
soonersoccer

Feb 10 @ 5:35AM  
I guess this one didn't work out too well for me. That's the peril of posting drunk I guess.
Wordsofwit

Feb 10 @ 5:43AM  
I can't believe you haven't deleted this b;ph before the rest of the country wakes up and read it.
fortysixandtwo

Feb 10 @ 8:47AM  
I told you should have spent that $625 on hookers and you wouldn't be acting so damn desperate
theSkwirl

Feb 10 @ 9:36AM  
A pity fuck is a pity fuck.. and rarely worth the effort.. I'd rather see ya being a charmer than just another wanna fuck.

It takes time m'dear..but this place actually works.. ask a few who have found just exactly what they are looking for.. CL.. Griz.. DKW and BlueEyes, Sunny and Billy, Crissy and G, Baldy and Belle.. I'm sure there are a few others who are slipping thru the cracks in my somewhat wobbly first thing in the morning mind.. but you get the picture? it can work.. you only get out of it what you can put into it.
casuallylooking

Feb 10 @ 10:13AM  
If your teddy bear reads this, it will walk on you.


A pity fuck is a pity fuck.. and rarely worth the effort.. I'd rather see ya being a charmer than just another wanna fuck.
As would most of us... It does take time, and you've been here what? Maybe a week or two...
Yes, many consider this a sex site, that doesn't mean you sign in and get sex.. Some people meet people at bars and have sex, that doesn't mean that just because you walk in to a bar that you are going to find someone to have sex with you.

Maybe you shouldn't drink and blog, because this blog and your profile are nothing alike. Let people see the person who wrote that essay.. trust me it will get you a whole lot farther than this blog..BTW, really good essay. And that is something I don't get a chance to say too often.
kittykirkland

Feb 10 @ 10:28AM  
I understand your frustration but your not selling yourself positively. You're feeling sorry for yourself and sending out a desperate vibe. Women aren't there to make you feel good mentally. You need to change your whole demeanor, get a picture that shows personality, and think about what you can offer. Women look for men that can please so your profile should not be all about you, you, you. Better you should ask in your blog what women want in men. That should be your focus.

Best of luck
casuallylooking

Feb 10 @ 11:02AM  
You need to change your whole demeanor, get a picture that shows personality, and think about what you can offer.
I beg to differ... I think his profile did say that he has a few things to offer. Like a sense of humor, a caring ability and although he has a passion for soccer, he wants to do more than just have sex, be entertained by sports/video games and wants to share that with someone. He told who he is and isn't that what a personal profile is really about?

Change his whole demeanor? Isn't that like saying be what people want you to be not who you really are?

I agree some other pics might be a good idea......... but ummm...well who am I to say anything about pics?
Just my .02
dmbchick420

Feb 10 @ 11:12AM  
All I know is this blog is definitely Be original and stand out, like you did with your other blogs...not this same old tired crap that we see 100 times a day

Like a couple other people said, you need to have some patience. You can't just join this site, snap your fingers, and expect to get laid in the blink of an eye. Too many people seem to expect that here and when you expect that sort of thing, you are bound to get disappointed with the results.
lunanegra

Feb 10 @ 11:29AM  
Dude,don't you know there are no girls on the internets?*


*Before anyone takes an offense,its an inside joke on a website,thank you.
onehornytoad69

Feb 10 @ 11:38AM  
You can't just join this site, snap your fingers, and expect to get laid in the blink of an eye. Too many people seem to expect that here and when you expect that sort of thing, you are bound to get disappointed with the results.
Now that is the "Fucking" truth!!! Great words DMB !!!!
soonersoccer

Feb 10 @ 2:05PM  
I gotta say, as much as this blog seems to be a failure, I've got people reading it and talking about it. So perhaps it's not as bad as I thought. All press is good press, right? And as for my picture, I can't change what I look like.

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I used to try to be clever, but that never got me laid.