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How Long.....

posted 1/25/2009 9:09:43 AM |
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tagged: relationships
  onehornytoad69

Do we give a Person...to get over a Relationship..before we ask them out or start to get to know them better/ more personally?
The old saying is sometimes true, yanno..."The best way to get over a relationship is to get another one!"
So ...do we give the Person a little "Healing time" or do we just "Go for it"?
What do ya think? Would you want someone to wait....? or Does it matter?
I know some women that it took years of healing before they would date again!, But if someone would have went for it.. maybe just maybe it would have changed all that!!!
Personally, I just dont know!!!

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Comments:

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rnj1013

Jan 25 @ 9:22AM  
never hurts to ask...all they can say is I'm not ready
PinkToeNails

Jan 25 @ 9:25AM  
You might just be doing her a favor... sometimes people need a new friend to help get past an old one.
onehornytoad69

Jan 25 @ 9:35AM  
I hear ya rnj.... thx!
sometimes people need a new friend to help get past an old one
Very True...but I dont wanna get stuck in the Just Friends thingy.. yanno?
thx Lady!
zena343

Jan 25 @ 9:53AM  
Everyone is different, but I know for me personally to get over someone quicker is having someone else there whose company you enjoy, and if it leads to something else then just friends bonus.
Sunshine79

Jan 25 @ 10:26AM  
It just depends on the person and situation. If it was a good break up or a bad break up. Yanno?
bandengor

Jan 25 @ 10:42AM  
I kinda agree with rnj

I'd let her know you are there and why you are there, so she knows when she is ready
Wordsofwit

Jan 25 @ 10:46AM  
It varies depending not only on the individual but also the relationship and nature of the break up. If somebody had the typical three to six month crash and burn, no big deal. But if we are talking about something measured in years, that is totally different.

The other variable is how well you know the person and if you have any mutual friends. It is all on a case by case basis obviously. But if you know this person fairly well and there are mutual friends, then there is a degree of trust.

I always advocate that people become acquainted on a person to person basis, as friends and activity partners. After all there are a lot of simple things that a person would like to do but does not enjoy doing by themselves like going out to dinner.

A lot of times, the whole dating concept is far too heavy and more trouble than it is worth. Taking things at a leisurely pace reduces the adversarial nature of it and resulting pressure.
lunanegra

Jan 25 @ 12:36PM  
A lot of times, the whole dating concept is far too heavy and more trouble than it is worth. Taking things at a leisurely pace reduces the adversarial nature of it and resulting pressure.

Agreed. Some would just rather stay friends first than to jump into anything new after a bad break-up/separation/divorce. To go fast would definitely be detrimental at that point.
1bunny629

Jan 25 @ 4:17PM  
Make yourself available, but let her come to you. If she is interested she will let you know. I am the type that doesn't get into a relationship just to have someone. I live and let life take its turns. But if I see someone I am attracted to I let them know.
slohand_47

Jan 26 @ 10:48AM  
I'd say a combination of both. Ask her out right away... before someone else beats you to it.
BUT........ keep it light. Women don't want a man to fall in love on the first date, any more than men want women to. Get to know each other and give her time to trust & feel good about knowing you.
.02
Detach

Jan 26 @ 1:03PM  
This is news to me. I was never told that there was a set time limit to get over someone in the event of a break-up. Which rule book is this written in?
onehornytoad69

Jan 28 @ 1:02PM  
Well ... I talked with this Lady for a few days...... and we seemed to hit it off pretty good... but after her X Lover talked to her again... she went his way!
Duh me!!! ... So... yeah... a Lot of time is needed to say the least!!!
Lesson Learned!!!! No Harm done!!!! (I posted this for the ones who wanted me to keep yall updated! )

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How Long.....