I'm not sure if this has been posted yet.... I don't want the re-post police after me!
Posted to Craig's List Personals: To the Guy Who Mugged Me Downtown (Downtown, Savannah)
I was the white guy with the black Burrberry jacket that you demanded I hand over shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I hope you somehow come across this message. I'd like to apologize. I didn't expect you to crap your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. Truth is, I was wearing the jacket for a reason that evening, and it wasn't that cold outside. You see, my girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber 1911 .45 ACP pistol for Christmas, and we had just picked up a shoulder holster for it that evening. Beautiful pistol, eh? It's a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head, isn't it? I know it probably wasn't a great deal of fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge flopping about in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse since you also ended up leaving your shoes, cellphone, and wallet with me. I couldn't have you calling up any of your buddies to come help you try to mug us again. I took the liberty of calling your mother, or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, and explaining to her your situation. I also bought myself some gas on your card. I gave your shoes to one of the homeless guys over by Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all of the cash in your wallet, then I threw the wallet itself in a dumpster. I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell. They'll be on your bill in case you'd like to know which ones. Alltel recently shut down the line, and I've only had the phone for a little over a day now, so I don't know what's going on with that. I hope they haven't permanently cut off your service. I was about to make some threatening phone calls to the DA's office with it. Oh well. So, about your pants. I know that I was a little rough on you when you did this whole attempted mugging thing, so I'd like to make it up to you. I'm sure you've already washed your pants, so I'd like to help you out. I'd like to reimburse you for the detergent you used on the pants. What brand did you use, and was it liquid or powder? I'd also like to apologize for not killing you and instead making you walk back home humiliated. I'm hoping that you'll reconsider your choice of path in life. Next time you might not be so lucky. If you read this message, email me and we'll do lunch and laundry. Peace! - Alex
Now that's gun control at it's best.
Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)
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read more blogs!
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40DWM

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Jan 21 @ 6:57PM
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Nice post, 'lill green thingy to go with it.
Too bad, in R/L, any 'white guy' that would do such, would be considered in todays Political Correctness, to be the 'criminal'.
Makes me think of the guy that shot a drugged up, repeat criminal that was breaking into his house for the second time that night. Obama thought he should go to jail for protecting his family from death.
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PinkToeNails

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Jan 21 @ 7:09PM
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Obama huh?!?!??! What has this country gotten itself into?!?!??!?
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needsomenow789

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Jan 21 @ 7:13PM
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'very boring""""""""""""
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Sunshine79

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Jan 21 @ 7:13PM
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OMG, that was fucking great....LMAO
Hysterically awesome!!!!
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PinkToeNails

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Jan 21 @ 7:16PM
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'very boring Hmmm.. I don't recall asking your opinion but since this is an open blog, your comment is approved.....
I think you're just pissed that I never responded to your emails to me!
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PinkToeNails

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Jan 21 @ 7:17PM
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not according to dipshit Sunshine! LOL
I thought it was pretty good myself!
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needsomenow789

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Jan 21 @ 7:25PM
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honey sending you an email, " now that would really be boringgggggggggggggg
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sugarnspice005

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Jan 21 @ 7:28PM
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Boring? Someone has got to be kidding right? I found this to be hysterical.
I'm even gonna risk Prez's wrath and leave ya a kudo.
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PinkToeNails

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Jan 21 @ 7:28PM
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I'm leaving your comment for alllllllllllllllllllll the lovely ladies to see!!!!
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ynot7769

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Jan 21 @ 8:15PM
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lmfao!!
had to read that to my mom...
and NOW ya'll know why he needs some now lol
shitty personality
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paulywalnuts

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Jan 21 @ 8:48PM
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Fabulous...You go girl
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girlcountry

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Jan 21 @ 9:25PM
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And they want gun control....why????? good blog! I can see that happening in Atlanta!!
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casuallylooking

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Jan 22 @ 12:31AM
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I don't quite understand when people find something not of interest to them, why they can't just pass it by instead of having to be rude.
I thought it was a funny blog........ I would have about died laughing had I read it on craigslist...
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onehornytoad69

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Jan 22 @ 7:30AM
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Good Post!!! I love it!!!!
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max49

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Jan 22 @ 9:48AM
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What a fine upstanding citizen to apologize for making the guy shit his pants and walk home. Sounds like something that might happen on the streets of Nashville. kudo sweetie.
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ynot7769

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Jan 22 @ 12:02PM
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this is also a good reason for ME not to own a gun....he he he...bit late tho
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dmbchick420

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Jan 22 @ 12:53PM
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LOL....good one! I bet he won't be mugging people anymore!!!
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