I just wanted to say thanks to all of you that said a prayer, lit a candle, or did whatever it is you do in reference to my Sam. He lost his battle with whatever made him so sick on Monday.
Sunday night he got really bad, couldn't stand up, wouldn't drink water, or eat (which he hadn't done in over a week unless he was force fed). We called the vet and met him at his office. He couldn't believe he was as bad as he was, he had just seen him on wednesday and he was acting pretty normal then. He kept Sam overnight and put an IV in, started antibiotics, and was going to watch him. The vet told me that even with all of that he didn't know if he would make it through the night. He called the next morning and said that Sam was still with us, and seemed more alert.
My mom went to see him, and called me to come up there. I went thinking he was doing better. The vet told me he thought Sam probably had a tumor in his Pituitary gland, but they couldn't say for sure without an MRI or CT scan. My poor puppy looked miserable. My mom left and my dad came up. He said it was my decision, and what did I want to do. I had already pretty much decided that they should just go ahead and put him to sleep. His prognosis wasn't good and I didn't want him to suffer needlessly. My dad went to pet and talk to Sam, he looked up at me and said the dog was barely breathing. I watched for a minute, it didn't look like he was breathing at all. I called the vet, he said Sam was gone.
I don't understand what I've done that's bad enough that I deserve to lose 2 things that I loved very much this year. I already had issues with God. I was finally starting to get over some of my anger. Now i'm just as angry as I was before. I know that losing my dog wasn't as bad as losing my baby, but he was a part of my family.
I just don't think i'll ever understand why certain things happen.
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