Ladles and Jellyspoons, I stand before you today... hair going every which way and looking much like the needles on a blue spruce.. to give my inaugural speech as the new reigning Kudo Whore of Pervia. So, everyone please take a seat and put your Whisper 2000s to good use .. cuz I'm only gonna say this one time. (today)
I was born in a little rustic hollow in an ancient oak on the border of Lake Pervia. It was a one room home and my mother was a single Skwirl who worked seventy lebben jobs to feed her brood of 14. I have 8 sisters and two brothers.. or.. I should say.. HAD. Xquseme has been out here along with a few other dudes and their Skwirl hunting rifles so I'm not sure right now what the count is.
My momma taught me many lessons. Always line your nest with soft fluffy stuff. Hoard as many nuts and kudo cookies as you can before winter sets in, don't let anyone get between you and the nuts. Those kinda things.. She taught me to always stick up for the weaker ones and to never ever back down.
I'd like to spank all the spammers, scammers and katzenjammers I rode roughshod over to get to the top. Tonight... (tear) tonight is the culmination of a dream.. ok so it was a really smutty dream in which Pudge the Pretty and L4E were both nekkid and tied to my bed.. but it IS the culmination of a dream..wait..where was I goin with this.. oh.. right.. Of world domination by Skwirls and deposing all the Penguins who have been trying to take over.
My first act as Reigning Kudo Whore is to deport all Penguins back to the frozen nippy South Pole where their nasty cold feet and hearts will fit right in.. and to promise warm fuzzies to everyone who worships the Skwirl.. (oh .. I might be getting ahead of the game here) .. anyway.. right.. so what I'm really trying to say is...
Leave a Kudo at the door .. cuz I'm the bestest Kudo Whore!!!!
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