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One Dark Night... When the Moon is Full!

posted 10/23/2008 11:54:18 AM |
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tagged: story, rant, moral, fuck

Once upon a time in the fair land of Pervia, there lived a merry band of Pervisites. The Pervisites spent all their time slaying the dreaded Trollians and trying to keep them from taking over Pervia, thereby enslaving all the Pervs for their own nefarious purposes.

"The trouble, said King Ponme of Pervia, with trolls, is that they spread their vitriolic goo all across the landscape and leave a horrible stench that blocks up the Pervisite nostrils. This generally leads to much bitchering and whinifying mainly from the male population of Pervia as their olfactory senses are the only thing that allows them to find a mate. We Pervisites must stand strong in the face of such a stultifying and repulsive threat!"

"But King Ponme!, cried the masses, We don't want to fight, can't we all just get along?"

Then the masses rose up with their pitchforks and flaming torches and stormed the Castle, casting King Ponme into the bog of eternal forgetfulness. Chaos reigned for many many moons.

The land of Pervia was soon overrun with Trollians and their foul smelling goo. There was much screeching and gnashing of teeth. "Oh how we long for a champion!", cried the masses.

One bright sunny day, King Ponme's rotting carcass caught a ray of sunshine and burst into flames... from the ashes rose a new and improved Troll fighting machine.. Nacho Baby, who, along with her many knights and Knightesses errant rode into battle with innumerable vile goo spewing Trollians. Sir Ynot the Nonpullingover, Lady L4E, the sexyashellvixen, LBS with her mighty buttkicking spurs, THe soup kitchen ladies and the R&R shack broads, Pudge the Pretty, and a cast of twenties... (anyone got any twenties? I could use a couple) all lead a revolution that would last for many many many many waaaaaaay too many days and nights.

The land of Fair Pervia was in ruins. The band of mighty hero/ines who had lately been lauded as saviors again were reviled by the masses. "Don't fight.. we're tired of fighting.. stop the war!" "Can't we all just get along?"

So once again.. Nacho Baby was cast into a pit of dark despair.. only to return eventually as the mild mannered and goofy nut hunter, theSkwirl. But deep inside beats the heart of a warrior. Only waiting for a good fight to fight.. a defenseless that needs defending.. a cause that's worth the effort. Beware...

One dark night.. when the moon is full... and the pall and stench of goo lays over the land.. and the people of Pervia cry out for a new hero... one dark night.. the standards shall again be raised and the battle cry of Death to the Trollians shall again be heard, echoing through the hills and vales of Pervia the Fair.. and a band of mighty warriors (or thick skinned bastards that can take the heat) shall gain rise and go forth to do battle and rid the land of mate finding retardant goo.

The moral of this story is.. the more things change..the more they stay the same. Quitcher bitcherin.

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post a comment!


Oct 23 @ 11:57AM  
Muwahahahahah I commented AND Kudo'd myself!!!

Oct 23 @ 12:02PM  
the more things change..the more they stay the same

Yup! Cause in my dreams I am still molesticating the hell out of Nacho Baby and Pudge the Pretty! Damn! Too much Disney. Still keep believing dreams do come true.

Oct 23 @ 12:02PM  
That was great! I enjoyed reading that...and I'm gonna give ya a kudo

Oct 23 @ 12:05PM  
Here--have one from MY basket, too....!!

Oct 23 @ 12:07PM  
Nope Nope Nope..........not going to quit my bitching when I just got started again.........

There is no win win in pervia.......when people all get along everyone whines its boring..........when they fight......people start shit and bad mouth people cause they listen to one side of the story and take sides.........because of alot of the fighting behind the scenes......and the ones who bitch the most about how much the fighting is upsetting them is the ones who want everyone to get along....and than complain its boring in here ...what most dont understand is not everyone is going to get along........only in a land of make beleive does everyone get along..........most of the time.........

Great Blog........kudos to you.

Oct 23 @ 12:11PM  
Damn and I didn't even get a mention But I still loves ya!

You're entirely correct, the more things change the more they stay the same!

Oct 23 @ 12:21PM  
as I sweep all the shit out da door I play with the skwirls nuts and keep the maids away from the knights

Oct 23 @ 12:22PM  
Oh Nacho Baby, you saved us.

Tell us how you did it. You can't? Why is your mouth is full of nuts?

Oct 23 @ 12:23PM  
Gorram it.. someone is withholding the cookies.. I want my COOKIES!!!!

nuts will do.. or.. buckeyes.. *looks up and waits*

Oct 23 @ 12:28PM  
very nice

Oct 23 @ 12:30PM  
Yep things are alway's the same around here...
Great blog.. Now here is your Kudo...

Oct 23 @ 12:44PM  
There's your cookie, my furry friend

Oct 23 @ 12:51PM  
Gorram it.. someone is withholding the cookies.. I want my COOKIES!!!!
Seems to me we have a new kudo whore.............guess a new swearing in is needed...........I wonder is borty will be the host again?

Oct 23 @ 12:52PM  
I'm good at swearing!!!!

Oct 23 @ 12:57PM  
I'm good at swearing

Me too! Me too!

Oct 23 @ 1:03PM  
Quitcher bitcherin.
Are you nuts?? Or just eaten too many of them...I'm not gonna quit bitchin'. It's just my nature....


Oct 23 @ 1:03PM  
That was great, greenie for you!!!

Oct 23 @ 1:41PM  
Ok,I have a fresh baked basket of green cookies. Sugar cookies with green sprinkles,here you go. Also,a squirrel in knights armor...that'd look pretty badassed if I should say so.

Oct 23 @ 3:20PM  
Here's your damn cookie

just more for me to sweep up

Oct 23 @ 3:29PM  
Yaaaaaa....I love your stories Skirlie girl and Dayna ...sure I'll show up for my master of ceremonies job...if I can find Max...he took off with the panty van again ...said he was going to Florida to do some research...

Oct 23 @ 4:11PM  
Great story Sam. Keep up the good work. We always enjoy your stories. Can we look forward to more bedtime stories soon?

Oct 23 @ 4:20PM  
Lookie who Skwirly's blog brought back! Hi blueyes! Missed you!

Oct 23 @ 8:02PM  
Love the story, Sam! Here's a kudo!

Oct 23 @ 8:21PM  
*zips thru with the mrs throwing kudo's ................and not pulling over *

Skwirl....she said she got wet while i read this to her......soooo i'll have to go for now....things to do.....

Oct 23 @ 8:25PM  
Green thingy!

Oct 23 @ 8:28PM  
Here's a kudo for you.

Oct 23 @ 9:31PM  
alright Skwirl
put em up - put em uppppppppppppppppp
if it's a fight ya want - it's a fight ya................
psssst - skwirl girl
who's fightin'?

Oct 23 @ 9:36PM  
One dark night...
*Clouds Thicken*

One dark night...
*Thunder Rumbles*

One dark night...
*An evil laugh echoes forth from the shadows as a deep husky voice says,
"silly said it three times...."
*Two blazing red eyes glow forth from the darkness*

many knights and Knightesses errant rode into battle with innumerable vile goo spewing Trollians. Sir Ynot the Nonpullingover, Lady L4E, the sexyashellvixen, LBS with her mighty buttkicking spurs, THe soup kitchen ladies and the R&R shack broads, Pudge the Pretty, and a cast of twenties...

Missed one....*Wicked Chuckle* I suppose the Bog of Eternal Forgetfulness erased your recollections and a few others as well...

I too was shoved into the shadows...but to the masses likely dismay...
I like it there.
So...I never left. always...ever watchful.

the more things change..the more they stay the same.

Second that...

*Slowly fades into the Darkness*

Oct 23 @ 9:37PM  
nevermind Skwirl Girl
I done figgered it out

Oct 24 @ 4:27AM  
I just love it when DKW comes out to play!

Oct 24 @ 8:45AM  
If the moon is full how can the night be dark?

Oct 24 @ 10:42AM  
Clouds WoW...clouds obscuring the face of the moon.. and cuz I said so..

Oct 24 @ 10:43AM  
Of course I invoked OneDarkKnight... geeeze.. it wasn't by accident you know...

Oct 24 @ 8:25PM  
Dammit! I miss out when I'm gone so long!!!
Gimme a min, I'm looking for my spurs!! *raises bedskirt and peeks under bed* Nope! not under there!
*looks in hall closet* shit! where could they be???
AHA!!! Back of the closet!!! I knew I still had em somewheres!!!!
At your service mi' Liege!

Sorry, got distracted there for a min, forgot what I was's your shiny green thingy!!

Oct 25 @ 3:43PM  
I know something that squirts goo...

Oct 25 @ 4:38PM  
lol,you so nasty mcroxton....

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One Dark Night... When the Moon is Full!