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Two Jokes

posted 9/28/2008 8:17:50 AM |
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  Wordsofwit

Don't think this a rerun. The second one is pretty good I think. It comes from Softy. She had posted it in a comment to her own blog, so many people may have missed it.

One Sunday morning, everyone in one bright, beautiful, tiny town got up early and went to the local church.

Before the services started, the townspeople were sitting in their pews and talking about their lives, their families, etc. Suddenly, Satan appeared at the pulpit. Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate.

Soon everyone was evacuated from the church, except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew, not moving... seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy was in his presence. Now this confused Satan a bit, so he walked up to the man and said, "Don't you know who I am?"

The man replied, "Yep, sure do."

Satan asked, "Aren't you afraid of me?"

"Nope, sure ain't," said the man.

Satan was a little perturbed at this and queried, "Why aren't you afraid of me?"

The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years."




Why do women have two sets of lips? So they can piss and moan at the same time.

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Comments:

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flavorbuster

Sep 28 @ 8:51AM  
Those are pretty good....
theSkwirl

Sep 28 @ 10:12AM  
First one was run about a week ago but I don't remember by whom... still funny though..


Second one? well doll.. *bite*
Sunshine79

Sep 28 @ 10:28AM  
Loved both, they were great!!

Thanks Bruce and Softy!
onehornytoad69

Sep 28 @ 11:07AM  
thx!
1bunny629

Sep 28 @ 11:40AM  
First one cracked me up, but this part really got me going..."
townspeople were sitting in their pews "
...I laughed out loud...sittin in their pew! ewwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Second...You wouldn't care what my "TWO LIPS" were doing if I was sittin on your face! HA! had to say it....
manwithoutahorse

online now!
Sep 28 @ 11:45AM  
Amen and Amen.
ynot7769

Sep 28 @ 12:12PM  
loved the first one ....and it's an oldie but deff a goodie...

2nd..not sure what was better the joke or bunny's spin on it with her comment/answer
lunanegra

Sep 28 @ 12:21PM  
Why do women have two sets of lips? So they can piss and moan at the same time.

Ok,I admit....

I lol'd a bit.
ynot7769

Sep 28 @ 12:24PM  
he he he you and bunny can share the kudo
ThePurpleProphet

Sep 28 @ 12:34PM  
dems funny right there.

If bunny were to be sittin on you're face there would less pissin and more moanin.
ynot7769

Sep 28 @ 1:04PM  
If bunny were to be sittin on you're face there would less pissin and more moanin.
how would he type these jokes then???
soft_touch938

Sep 28 @ 10:28PM  
Just to set the record straight.........

I can never remember jokes. Someone asked me in my blog if I knew any jokes...I didn't.

Later I got a call from my mechanic....car is on the fritz AGAIN....and he told me this joke so while it was fresh in my mind I went back to my blog and posted it in the comments.

If any women was offended they might want to take a chill pill....no offense was intended.

Besides...it's my perogative to piss 'n moan and I do it well...
Cootiesprayer

Sep 29 @ 5:05AM  
If a rooster was on top of a house and laid an egg, which side of the house would the egg roll down?
casuallylooking

Sep 29 @ 5:18AM  
If a rooster was on top of a house and laid an egg, which side of the house would the egg roll down?
Neither...he just cockadoodledoos and leaves laying the eggs to the chickens.
Cootiesprayer

Sep 29 @ 6:01AM  
I actually got stumped on this one. Just felt it was an oldie but goodie, thanks casual.

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Two Jokes