A mother who has bipolar & depression, has tried to get help, she has been to a dozen different therapists & doctors to try to find medication that will help with her anger...sees how her anger is affecting her children, they are in therapy to try to cope with the mom's disease including the husband & dad. Dad threatens after a police report was made against the mother for child abuse. (The mother was caught spanking the child & yelling in a public place, like any parent would do). That if she didn't get help he would take the kids & leave her. He has family members to testify including her own mother that she is an unfit parent who has her kids terrified of her. When she isn't in her anger stage she truly loves her kids but is afraid that her anger will only get worse with age & time. The father is patient & has been trying to work with the mom but nothing seems to help.
She feels hopeless & a failure, she decides the best thing that she can do for her family's sake & her own sanity is to pack her things & leave them all. Start fresh in a different state & learn to cope with the loss...she feels the kids will be better off without her. There is strong family support on both sides of the family so the kids will not grow up with all of that anger & are in support group that should help also.
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| Mental health causes a mom to leave her family |
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wtxman
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Sep 4 @ 7:59PM
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She feels hopeless & a failure, she decides the best thing that she can do for her family's sake & her own sanity is to pack her things & leave them all. Start fresh in a different state & learn to cope with the loss...she feels the kids will be better off without her. There is strong family support on both sides of the family so the kids will not grow up with all of that anger & are in support group that should help also.
Where ever she goes,she will still have to face up to her problems; just a thought 
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StraddleMyNose
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Sep 4 @ 8:05PM
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Where ever she goes,she will still have to face up to her problems; just a thought
I'm going to have to agree with Larry. Also, I could never leave my kids regardless of the situation.
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zaralyon
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Sep 4 @ 8:12PM
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actually its not a good thing to do. you will leave the kids thinking it was them all along, or even worse depending on their ages with the memory of a shrew who abandoned them. You should get help for anger management now! not to mention help for your bipolar issues.
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Sunshine79
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Sep 4 @ 8:18PM
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Wow, it's bad if she stays and bad if she goes...
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Cootiesprayer
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Sep 4 @ 8:48PM
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You should get help for anger management now! not to mention help for your bipolar issues
been to a dozen different therapists & doctors to try to find medication that will help with her anger
in therapy to try to cope with the mom's disease including the husband & dad including the mother who sees her own therapist for her anger & bipolar which happens to be the 5th in the last year & still no help
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zaralyon
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Sep 4 @ 8:58PM
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including the mother who sees her own therapist for her anger & bipolar which happens to be the 5th in the last year & still no help
5 therapists in a year? thats therapy shopping, its time to stop therapy shopping, anger management could bet gotten with someone other than your regular therapist. And yes you do need to find a regular therapist and take the time to actually see if it works. give them a chance to see if they can help you or not.
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lunanegra
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Sep 4 @ 9:01PM
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Well,it takes a lot of effort on the part of the patient as well.Of course,you can't force the patient if they don't want to,they have to want it.
Also,I agree with the others..someone that is emotionally/mentally ill shouldn't exactly distance themselves from the problem...it will not go away on its own.Its pretty much a copout to leave one's kids.
Annnd...I am not shooting from the hip.I am there,since I suffer from chronic depression and other things.I'm going along with it and getting the help I need.
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Cootiesprayer
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Sep 4 @ 9:13PM
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Of course,you can't force the patient if they don't want to,they have to want it.
which part of having been to 5 different therapists countless doctors for different meds to try to get it under control makes it sound like i haven't been trying...oh & by the way my therapist has said that bipolar is the most difficult disease to try to help, manic patients generally don't ever find a medicine that works..so while i am glad you have found something that works for you I am still looking & yes i do want the help...hence looking for a therapist & a med that actually works...
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dumblonde
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Sep 4 @ 9:24PM
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abilify...
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theSkwirl
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Sep 4 @ 9:34PM
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Offering advice and pushing will only serve to escalate the issue. BiPolar is an insidious miserable disease.
Ditching the kids though, not such a good thing. Consider an inpatient treatment for a time. Good luck to you.
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Cootiesprayer
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Sep 4 @ 9:55PM
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Bipolar disorder is marked by severe mood swings that can make an individual go from contentment/aggression/irritable to extreme sadness/hopelessness/melancholy; then back again in a matter of minutes without any explicable change in environment or situation. The two stages of Bipolar disorder, mania and depression, both have individual characteristics that are vastly different than their counterpart. Both can have detrimental affects on the individual’s personal, social, and financial life. Mania is commonly trademarked by over activity, increased energy, and restlessness. Often times, individuals find themselves extremely happy for no apparent reason, and even experiencing a euphoria of some sort. They often will exhibit traits that were for the most part, uncommon to them, such as an increased irritability and irrationality. They may talk extremely fast, have trouble focusing on one or more topic, and need little to no sleep to feel productive and healthy(Cassano, G.B., et al. 2004). Although it is commonly believed that the depression of Bipolar is the most lethal aspect (suicide), mania has dangerous elements on the individual’s judgement and behavior. Individuals may start experimenting with controlled substances, most notedly cocaine, alcohol, and barbituates. The sense of inhibition goes down, and increased sexual drive can lead to often provacative, unwanted, and even sexually aggressive behavior. To be considered a manic episode, the person must experience three or more of these behaviors most of the day, for almost every day, for at least one week. However, when swings of irritation are present, the individual must display at least four other characteristics in order for a doctor to diagnose Bipolar.
This is what i have to go through every single day on top of the headaches, forgetfullness, & the constant nagging of my family to simple snap out of it.
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theSkwirl
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Sep 4 @ 9:59PM
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too often people assume that they know what you are feeling. It's hard for them to understand. just do the best for yourself that you can and never give up.. that's all the advice I have for ya.
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Cootiesprayer
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Sep 4 @ 10:02PM
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I couldn't agree with you more. Skwirl thanks.
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themama
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Sep 4 @ 11:19PM
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I say stick it out with your kids.. They will in the end not be better off w/out you..
To hell w/ the husband and his family.. Sounds like they are no help to you..
You yourself have a long and hellish road to lead..Find friends to talk to.. To let it all out and help you along the way.. 
Good luck to you in your fight to find inner peace with in yourself.. 
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mcroxton
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Sep 5 @ 12:09AM
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I think the cause of the mom leaving her family is a choice she made, not necessarily direct causation. Know what I mean?
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Cootiesprayer
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Sep 9 @ 2:13PM
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For those of you who actually expressed concern & did not judge. I had my appointment today & she is a very nice woman who pulls no punches (just the way I like it). She is putting me on Depakote & I have to start writing all of my feelings in a journal that way I can let the anger out in a constructive manner & not on the people around me & it gives me the release I need. I will update this as I progress. Thanks again to the kind people on this site it was very much appreciated.
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funnywhapper
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Sep 18 @ 11:10PM
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here in our psychiatric dictatorship, our red-fascist police state,
losing one's temper is considered to be 'causing a scene'. we must
all be mellow, peaceful, calm, cool and collected at all times.
not get mad, or sad or into a new fad. no matter what we must not panic,
or get upset, or hysterical. for this is the Mellow Law. peace and love.
peace and freedom. when stuck on the freeway for ten hours going
to work, be calm and loving and peaceful and courteous. thou shalt not get mad.
get outta the car, fuming.
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Cootiesprayer
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Oct 1 @ 4:59PM
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The therapy is going. Anger still there, trying new meds & the new techniques. This worker seems to try harder to help. Thanks again for all the wonderful advice.
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