One of the things I've learned over the years is that the best way to see how well friends, neighbors, coworkers,etc know you is to have them set you up on a blind date. I've been on a number of them and some worked out well, a few resulted in friendships, but most ended with a kiss goodnight and a "Take care of yourself."
A few of them reminded me of Dante's inferno! Several years ago, a friend set me up with a girl who "had a great personality" which is code for "not very attractive." We met at a restaurant and I quickly figured out that she was a bitch on wheels! She was rude to anyone remotely resembling a human being, including me. She complained about the food, her ex, her kids, her job, her family, etc. She was one of the most negative people I ever met!
After dinner (yeah, I stuck it out!), I walked her to her car where she told me her kids were with her ex and asked if I wanted to go to her place for a little fun. I politely said no, to which she responded "What? Are you gay?"
All I could do was laugh as I walked away. I asked my friend about her later, who said she was nice the one time he met her, in a bar, when she was drunk. Lovely!
More recently, my neighbor set me up with one of her coworkers who she barely new. She came over to me house. I opened the front door to find a very attractive, tall, slender blond holding a 12 pack of beer. OK, it was a 12 pack when she left her house. It was now down to a 9 pack. Here was my sign, and I didn't see it!
We talked while I cooked dinner. The conversation started out great but soon got difficult as she got to beers # 6 and 7. Dinner was ready so I ate while she drank her dinner. Later, when the beer was gone, she told me she was going to bed. She started taking her clothes off as she walked upstairs. I followed the trail of clothes to find her in my bed, nekkid, and almost passed out.
OK, you can call me a dumbass now. I got nekkid and climbed into bed with her. We kissed for a bit then she fought me off. I gave up them she started kissing me before she got belligerent. This cycle repeated itself for way too long before she passed out for good.
Now for the total fucking dumbass move on my part. We went out a few more times and each time was the same. She was a great girl sober, but that only lasted an hour. Last I heard, she was dating another alcoholic. Good for her!
Does anyone have any blind date from hell stories to share? Let me know I'm not the only one!
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Ewe_Wish
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Aug 19 @ 5:51PM
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a friend set me up with a girl who "had a great personality" which is code for "not very attractive." Damn now i know what you meant when you sent me the email telling me I had a great personality...........  
Now for the total fucking dumbass move on my part. Ummmm No Comment!!!! 
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alybai42
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Aug 19 @ 6:15PM
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I have only been on one blind date...It turned out ok I guess...
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Wordsofwit
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Aug 19 @ 6:50PM
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I only recall one that might fit. It was my first and only negative encounter with someone I became acquainted with online. We had spoken on the phone a couple of times and she was quite intelligent. We agreed that we would do lunch and I would come by her apartment and pick her up. She asked me what I wanted her to wear, and trying to be clever, I said, "Earrings, perfume and a smile would be fine."
She said she was 33 YO, 5'8", buxom, and had great legs. These statements would all prove to be true. When I knocked upon the door, she opened the door in the nude except for earrings and reeking of foo foo juice. She pulled me inside, and outweighing me by a good 40 pounds, danced me around and plopped me onto the couch and proceeded to attempt to unzip my fly.
While everything she said was true, she looked like W. C. Fields' sister. Her titties hung down like somebody's grandmother's with veins resembling a road map of St. Paul and Minneapolis. Plus, they were different sizes. She had so many moles that a dalmatian would call her spot. I got the hell out of there as soon as I could.
Still makes me shiver and grimace recalling it 13 or 14 years later. I can't truly call it a date from hell, but it is the weirdest negative encounter I have ever had.
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Sunshine79
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Aug 19 @ 7:29PM
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OMG, thats somr funny shit!!!
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soft_touch938
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Aug 19 @ 8:16PM
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I've only had 3 blind dates. One was nervous as a whore in church and seemed scared to death I'd order food instead of just coffee. He spent the entire time talking about his ex...he'd been divorced for 9 years! I begin to tell him in colorful terms of how I like to drink and party....he couldn't get out of there fast enough... 
The other two were bland and boring and I couldn't get out of there fast enough. Now I don't do blind dates....period.
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StraddleMyNose
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Aug 20 @ 9:44PM
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Believe it or not I have never had a blind date. I have always known what she looked like before going out with that person.
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