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posted 7/1/2008 7:27:36 PM |
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tagged: animals, sunshine
  Sunshine79

DOG'S DIARY

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!

9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!

9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!

10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!

12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!

1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!

3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!

5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!

7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!

8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with my people! My favorite thing!

11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!




CAT'S DIARY

Day 983 of my captivity.





My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.





The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.






In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.





Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.





Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.





Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.





I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously a trustee.



The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now...

............ ................ ............. .......... ..............

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Comments:

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wtxman

Jul 1 @ 7:37PM  
Stop it allready, you're killing me
buatbu

Jul 1 @ 7:49PM  
One reason I don't have a cat and have two dogs.
sugarnspice005

Jul 1 @ 8:01PM  
One reason I don't have a cat and have two dogs.

I've got 1 cat and 5 dogs...and 1 bird.....

Oh lord!!! I've got a mad house here!!!


sugarnspice005

Jul 1 @ 8:02PM  
OOPS!! Just got reminded by the sound of a little "meow"....got 5 kittens here I'm caring for..their momma disappeared...I think my neighbor who hates cats might have done something to her.
lynxkat

Jul 1 @ 8:07PM  
Humor often has truth in it!

"Dogs have owners. Cats have staff."

And, from Stephen King's short story, "L.T.'s Theory of Pets":
-- "A cat won't curry favor even if it's in their best interests to do so. A cat can't be a hypocrite. If more preachers were like cats, this would be a religious country again. If a cat likes you, you know. If she doesn't, you know that, too."
rescueremedy

Jul 1 @ 8:10PM  
Sugar ...I hope your neighbor didn`t do anything to the cat .



Sunshine ...this is toooo funny ...TY for the laugh ...
Sunshine79

Jul 1 @ 8:15PM  
I think cats are way more spoiled.
girlcountry

Jul 1 @ 8:24PM  
Talk about spoiled!! you should see my dog!!
hedonisticaddict

Jul 10 @ 2:57PM  
Well that was entertaining, one question though, what is going on in the bird's mind?
Wordsofwit

Jul 10 @ 3:04PM  
oldie but goodie that I have not seen on here. Greenie for ya!

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