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Self Confidence: Where do you get yours?

posted 6/30/2008 9:49:45 PM |
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  manwithoutahorse

Some people seem to be born brimming with self-confidence. Others go through life looking over their shoulder. Some get theirs from a bottle and others need to exert power over someone weaker to find it.

Throughout my life I've been called self-confident, self -assured, egotistical, and "full of it". Inside I'm almost always shaking just a little bit, not as self confident on the inside as I am on the outside. It takes a great deal of self-talk and "mind over matter" to keep my strong exterior intact.

How about you? Is it faith? family? a support group? Where do you get your self-confidence?

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Comments:

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Sunshine79

Jun 30 @ 9:54PM  
From a higher power within!
SxzeNewMe

Jun 30 @ 10:07PM  
Positive reinforcement.
1bunny629

Jun 30 @ 10:07PM  
I got my self comfidence from many experiences over the years. Not until I realized I didn't have to live up to anyonelses expectations but my own did I truly become one with myself. Confidence comes with ridicule, but those people are the ones who are confused and are too absorbed with others familiarity instead of trying to find their own.
aftershox

Jun 30 @ 10:36PM  
I think self-confidence is developed very young. The more a baby is cuddled and loved, the more self-confident and secure that child feels.

I was breast fed and cuddled to no end as a young child. I think I owe alot of my self-confidence to those years.

whisperingcomet

Jun 30 @ 10:43PM  
I was born with it...
SKEvalma

Jun 30 @ 11:18PM  
Well Luv I found my self confidence the wrong way ... I was challenge on my lifestyle ... I need to prove that my being a transgender was real and not just because of some clothes and makeup ... I cut my hair off short to a near buzz cut and I wore men's clothes and no makeup not even foundation ... for six months. I found out in those sex months that I was beyond passable as a woman ... I thought I found my self confidence. Later after taking a break from men for a while I realized the only way I could have passed that challenge was that it was within me all along. What I start out with was looking for confidence on the outside of me and validation later showed me that it had nothing to do with my outside appearance ... it had to do with my heart and soul. I was 25. I have never doubt myself since. Self Confidence for a person seems to bloom and blossom when the heart and soul deem a person is ready ... a wonderous gift not to be wasted or taken for granted.

Always With My Luv,
Ms. Eva
jcarolina

Jul 1 @ 9:35AM  
Mine's pretty much a mixture of what Comet, After, and Bunny said.

My faith does play a big part, I never look over my shoulder, I might look over yours though. I'm cocky by nature, all the men on both sides of my family are like that, most are even worse, but I'm a great person, and a good friend to have, until I get pissed off. Then the Irish in me comes out. But it takes only certain things to truly piss me. The rest I consider annoyances.


The only thing a bottle will do is make me slap someone a lot quicker.


Self-confidence comes with truly knowing who you are and being honest with yourself.

Nathaniel Hawthorne wrote, " A man can wear one face in public and another in private for only so long, before becoming confused as to which is the true face". That's not verbatim, but there's a lot of truth in that. If you try to be something you're not, any confidence you have is false.
StraddleMyNose

online now!
Jul 1 @ 3:10PM  
I think you're either born with it, or you're not to a certain degree as meaning how much you have and how much over time you develope it during the years. It actually never stops developing. When you get older you tend to gain more and more each time. Someone not born with it will more than likely continue getting shit on by people. If you have it, you're as good as gold. But then some will accuse you of having a HUGE ego. (ahem) Yes, I have had people tell me I have one HUGE ego. Not sure where they get these ideas. lol
lynxkat

Jul 1 @ 6:27PM  
I learned years ago, from playing tennis, that I'm at my best when "self" isn't an issue to me. When I'm just focused on what I'm doing, enjoying the moment, not concerned with what others think, then I really have it together. In athletics, it's 'being in the zone.' When I get there, I don't need self-confidence or self-esteem because I'm not dealing with any fears, anxieties, etc. There are also no power games and life seems to glide - no matter what the circumstances are!
rescueremedy

Jul 1 @ 6:33PM  
I think mine is a mixture .... I don`t know if i was born w/ it ,but my Family and Faith have alot to do w/ it . Great Blog Kudo
rnj1013

Jul 1 @ 6:36PM  
Most people who know me say I'm very self confident but I don't really think of myself that way. I just know who I am and what I have to offer and I go with that.

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Self Confidence: Where do you get yours?