Hello My AMD Luv's,
The Start to Summer is almost here ... really ?
The midwest is virtually under water. The west coast is on fire. The east feels like a deep freeze. I live in Upstate Ny and it is currently in the 50's. Highs lately have gotten into the low 60's. Feels like early spring or even fall at times. However I am not gonna complain. I like the cool or the warm.
I believe in the concept of Karma. Mother Nature wants to be heard and she will be heard. I just wonder how much more the USA can take before eyes turn to our plight here at home. (On The Off Chance a Bush might be on AMD.)
On the man front things are just as strange. I have three sisters ... two older and one younger. The younger one is doing great ... she is in the early stages of a friendship/relationship. She has it down pat. How to be a friend to a guy and at the same time be in love. Congrads to her ... I did not get that gene. However at the same time I do not envy her. I am single by choice. We are total opposites.
As for the two older ones ... DIVORCE CITY NEXT RIGHT. One is a religious nut job and the other is a holier than thou I am better than any type because I know all type. I am not like either of them. They do not put in the time or effort to make their marriages work so why should their men. If I have something or someone and I want to fight for that or them ... trust me I will.
Me ... I am too confusing for men right now. My relationship with a couple of bi women and a few lesbians has men around me right now confused. However the relationships are not sexual by any means. Just things are right and good right now.
I have always said I know the type of man I am looking for ... we have to have that click. Sex is not the way a man is going to truly know me. Who I am in bed is not who I am in real life.
A former classmate of mine is running for a local office position. I heard him speak today and announce his canidency. I dawned on me ... he could not speak in high school and now 20 years later he still can not speak in front of a crowd. He was not changed ... I look at so many from my class and I see no changes in them. It is like the bell has just rung and it is off to 1st period English Lit.
I have realized I have changed. Back then being with men was easy. Trust and Honest was easy. Love felt good and being in love was the drug of choice. Just saying "My Boyfriend" was a high all it's own. Seeing him waiting by the car after school was out knowing he was waiting for me was like a Luv OD.
Life has changed this Queen. I have replaced words like Trust and Honest with the term Open. I look at men are you with me to be with me or just to be with someone. I have changed my standards and my eyes and senses are keener. These days he can wait by his car ... I have my own.
I would not change my life for nothing. Looking back is nice. Seeing old classmates from time to time is nice. Most of them do not know me any more. My looks and name have changed. Only a precious few truly know who I am when we cross paths. I like it that way. Back in the 80's my High School was not ready for a Drag Queen and I blew the doors wide open. I was myself and no one would deny me that. Right down to high heels in the boys gym locker room ... Coach never did know what to say or act ...
I like to sit back now and watch ... sometimes it is like no time has passed ... old cliques and friends are still old friends and cliques ... the jocks are still jocks just not in the shape they were in once upon a time. The good and the bad are all still there ... hard feelings still exist amoungst some. Regardless I wish them all the best of luck for the future. Feels like a year book signing.
I wonder just how crazy this summer is going to get. Not only here and with my class reunion ... but with the USA and the World.
If the US Government understood Karma and what we put out into this world comes back to us ... Good and Bad ... maybe the USA would have a fighting chance. Karma is like that ... one person's Karma affects not only them ... it affects many. Something Mr. Bush needs to think about.
A lot of people were ready to condem Sharon Stone for her comments regarding China and their natural dieaster. However I appaul her ... Karma is big this year. When our lives fall apart and out of our control ... we need to look at ourselves and what he have done and said. We need to re-examine our life.
That is what these past few years have been for me. Looking at my life and how I was and the person I want to be. It was time for a change and now I am seeing the changes some seven years later. Does not mean my Karma has changed ... just that I have. I see clearer. People say Age does that ... I say Time does that.
For those affected by the floods please know that I do not believe that is anyone Karma doing this. I would not wish for anyone to think that I am saying that the floods are a affect of bad Karma for those in the Mid-West.
I do belive however that much like the Katarina Victims ... that the USA will overlook the new Victims of these floods. I fear that for our Government Iraq and Iran are more important than those living on US Soil. I would say this is Karma for our Government. Gas Prices and the Floods ... and the Government still does not have their eyes or hearts open.
I think we are in for one Krazy Heated Summer ahead ... one that neither McCain or Obama are prepared for ... Change needs to come ... just will it ?
Ms. Eva 
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| A Crazy Krazy Start To Summer 2008 |
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