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Mean & Crude Horoscopes **(MAY OFFEND!!)**

posted 6/19/2008 7:38:23 AM |
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  Sunshine79

Aquarius (Jan 23 - Feb 22)- You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a jerk.




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Pieces (Feb 23 - Mar 22)- You are a pioneer type and think most people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand, impatient and full of advice. You do nothing but piss-off everyone you come in contact with. You are a prick.




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Aries (Mar 23 - Apr 22)- You have a wild imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are a general dipshit.



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Taurus (Apr 23 - May 22)- You are practical and persistent. You have a dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think you are stubborn and bullheaded. You are nothing but a goddamed communist.



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Gemini (May 23 - June 22)- You are a quick and intelligent thinker. People like you because you are bisexual. You are inclined to expect too much for too little. This means you are a cheap bastard. Gemini's are notorious for thriving on incest.




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Cancer (June 23 - July 22)- You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems, which makes you a sucker. You are always putting things off. That is why you will always be on welfare and won't be worth a crap. Everyone in prison is a Cancer.




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Leo (July 23 - Aug 22)- You consider yourself a born leader. Others think you are an idiot. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people are thieving bastards.




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Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22)- You are the logical type and hate disorder. Your shit-picking attitude is sickening to your friends and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while doing it. Virgos make good bus drivers and pimps.




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Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22)- You are the artistic type and have a difficult time dealing with reality. If you are a male you are probably queer. Chances for employment and monetary gain are nil. Most Libra women are whores. All Libras die of venereal disease.




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Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 22)- You are the worst of the lot. You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are the perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most Scorpios are murdered.




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Sagittarius (Nov 23 - Dec 22)- You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on your luck since you have no talent. The majority of Sagittarians are drunks. You are a worthless piece of crap.





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Capricorn (Dec 23 - Jan 22)- You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You are basically a chicken rap. There has never been a Capricorn of any importance. You should kill yourself.



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Comments:

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Sunshine79

Jun 19 @ 7:57AM  
Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22)- You are the logical type and hate disorder. Your shit-picking attitude is sickening to your friends and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while doing it. Virgos make good bus drivers and pimps.

This is mine......
nativeamr35

Jun 19 @ 8:15AM  
Aries (Mar 23 - Apr 22)- You have a wild imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are a general dipshit.


They are following me damn it!!!!!
whisperingcomet

Jun 19 @ 8:17AM  
Aries (Mar 23 - Apr 22)- You have a wild imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are a general dipshit




.Finally, I am understood



Lisa46

Jun 19 @ 8:27AM  
Taurus (Apr 23 - May 22)- You are practical and persistent. You have a dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think you are stubborn and bullheaded. You are nothing but a goddamed communist


Me stubborn??
ThePurpleProphet

Jun 19 @ 8:35AM  
Leo (July 23 - Aug 22)- You consider yourself a born leader. Others think you are an idiot. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people are thieving bastards.

This is B.S. Where did you find this? Leos lead because we are better than everyone else. Now just get in line and follow and stop being so critical. If you dont' want to get in line then a Leo will put you in line. We can't help it if we are better than all of you. Just accept your fate. And of course we are thieves. What you don't give us we will take when you are not looking.
SxzeNewMe

Jun 19 @ 8:50AM  
Sagittarius (Nov 23 - Dec 22)- You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on your luck since you have no talent. The majority of Sagittarians are drunks. You are a worthless piece of crap.


Ain't that the damned truth!
SxzeNewMe

Jun 19 @ 8:51AM  
"PurpleProphet" said:
We can't help it if we are better than all of you.

It's statements like this that make all fire signs look bad. I knew Leo would be the downfall of the Zodiac! *yanks on PP's Leo mane and runs*
NightOfOld

Jun 19 @ 11:18AM  

Aries (Mar 23 - Apr 22)- You have a wild imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are a general dipshit.
********************************************************************************************

But I was followed by the FBI for almost a year. And I had a lot of fun losing them every day.
manwithoutahorse

online now!
Jun 19 @ 11:21AM  
I'm aries, so I need a place to hide. But not here, too many other aries, which will mean this place will be swarming with feds soon.

Wonder why so many of us are here on AMD? Hmmmmm?
SxzeNewMe

Jun 19 @ 11:30AM  
Please note: so far, 6 of the comments are from people who are Fire signs...we so rock!!!
wtxman

Jun 19 @ 11:55AM  
Aquarius (Jan 23 - Feb 22)- You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a jerk.

We Shall know the Truth and It Shall Piss You Off

Darlin you are on a roll lately( lying of course) Great Blog( still lying) Gonna leave you a kudo( you guessed,still lying)
Sunshine79

Jun 19 @ 11:59AM  
I'm aries, so I need a place to hide. But not here, too many other aries, which will mean this place will be swarming with feds soon.

Wonder why so many of us are here on AMD? Hmmmmm?


It's a conspiracy.....Shh!!
ThePurpleProphet

Jun 19 @ 12:20PM  
It's statements like this that make all fire signs look bad

Fire signs can't look bad.

And miss Sxze, if you pull on my mane one more time I'll put you over my knee and fake like I'm going to spank you.
Scottishtease

Jun 19 @ 1:19PM  
Hey Sunshine!! I am a virgo as well....boy does that describe me to a tee chuckle..great blog hun. Tease...
lunanegra

Jun 19 @ 6:52PM  
Most Libra women are whores. All Libras die of venereal disease.

Its like that because who can choose? Honestly.
sugarnspice005

Jun 19 @ 7:33PM  
Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22)- You are the artistic type and have a difficult time dealing with reality. If you are a male you are probably queer. Chances for employment and monetary gain are nil. Most Libra women are whores. All Libras die of venereal disease.




WAIT!!!!! Am I supposed to be laughing or offended?


StraddleMyNose

Jun 21 @ 1:04AM  
Pieces (Feb 23 - Mar 22)- You are a pioneer type and think most people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand, impatient and full of advice. You do nothing but piss-off everyone you come in contact with. You are a prick.

I also think some are "pussyfaces"!

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Mean & Crude Horoscopes **(MAY OFFEND!!)**