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Douchest mall ever

posted 5/11/2008 4:45:24 PM |
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  beefygoblin

It turns out that in N.J. there is a mall which has no food court, instead it only has sit down resteraunts. The Isles are filled with mercades and porshes, every foreign overpriced piece of crap imaginable... but they don't have a bmw shop or anything of the like in the store... and the nordstroms has never heard of evisu or howe... and all the slutty bulimic teenaged girls had fat douche boyfriends on theyre arms pinching theyre asses...this was about as sureal as mothers day shopping gets (I was looking for something for my grandmother).

No I admit this isn't a sex blog...its just an update for anyone following my thus far sexless travels.

New Jersey...its just so douche.

Umm but if any of you New Jersey sluts don't yet hate me...well I'm here for ya...just give me a wink and I'll come running.


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Comments:

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lunanegra

May 11 @ 5:07PM  
I hate malls for those reasons alone.
beefygoblin

May 11 @ 5:38PM  
Well this one was the richest mall in the united states of america...complete with rules allowing for purse dogs....wtf is up with that?

lunanegra

May 11 @ 5:47PM  
Sounds lame....I'd only tolerate malls if there was something that I couldn't get online that merchants there only sold.Otherwise....fuck it.
rnj1013

May 11 @ 6:19PM  
I have noticed a developing trend here.....everywhere you seem to go is douche. With that being said.....1 has to begin to question oneself as to whether the locations are douche or they are douched up by visiting inhabitants? Just something to ponder this fine Sunday in May
beefygoblin

May 11 @ 6:33PM  
No its just Jersey...Kansas city is full of assholes, new jersey is full of douches, and new york...well you gotta love that mix, assholes douches and bitches with some chumscrubbers and dilleweeds mixed in. But in the end thats a lovely mix,they all cancel each other out.

Can't wait to go to Israel and give you my report on that hellhole.
rnj1013

May 11 @ 6:40PM  
you goin on Kibbutz?
beefygoblin

May 11 @ 6:45PM  
Well I have relatives on a Kibbutz...short answer is probably not though. Kibbutz camps tend to be by the boarder...and are basicaly hippie communes run by militants...if you can actualy wrap your head around that image. I am trying to find a way to see everything without going with a ovely protected tour group. I don't want to see just the touresty crap...its complicated.



rnj1013

May 11 @ 6:51PM  
it's really not. You buy my ticket and I'll show you all you need to know without the touristy crap or the militant hippies. I fuckin rule at tour guiding
Sunshine79

May 11 @ 9:48PM  
I went to the mall today...It sucked too. All the stores were boring. Not places real people would shop. Face it, real people don't look like the Abercrombie & Fitch guys and Victoria Secret gals...lol Anywho....I did get some stuff....and a lemonade, yum!!
kingdongilingus

May 12 @ 8:47AM  
Sir-Loin Goblin...........I feel for you.

Such Douchebaggery is always up north of the Mason-Dixon.

What is a "nordstroms"? I have heard of these "Beemers" and "Mercedes", that is called here, "Douchebaggery with too much Money-O". If it don't come with a Rhino liner to stop your bed from rusting out because of the 45lbs. of open Bud cans, and Wild Turkey bottles..................you get the point.

That is why I love the south. Plus, throwing a boat and a 30-06 with a stringer full of blue or flatheads don't work worth a fuck in a "cool" BMW. And spinners are funny to watch on a dirt road............

Your Shopping choices: Wal-Mart or K-Mart.

If it don't come from China, you are shit outta luck.

Makings shopping a helluva lot easier, since you have no choices.........
(Kind of like our current Presidential race....)

Note to the Green Goblin in NJ: All the world is your personal Douchebag, since all humanity, and all things human end up falling into "Douchest" territory no matter what.

I can only suggest moving to Russia, until they try to use your body as a Heroin Mule, or ransom what is left of it for $30 and a carton of Marlboros.

Such is Life, Super Gobber.

beefygoblin

May 12 @ 1:20PM  
Ummm the south sucks for me. You see I'm technocaly a ethnic minority...so the place I realy want to be is the south...or russia...russia is the skinhead capital of the world you know.

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Douchest mall ever