Oh yeah.... bacon.
So anyway... I keep going over to people's houses and see them making out with their pets. They exchange tongue kisses on the sofa the way teenagers do after the big game or maybe after a prom. You half expect the cat has unhooked the lady's bra and is rounding second base. Even more interesting is the lickfest this cat just gave his furry little butthole not five minutes ago. Can you say "yummy"..?
I knew you could....
Speaking of furry buttholes, my friends keep calling and leaving the same message over and over and over and over.. 
You'd think after I changed the outgoing message on my machine to say, "Guys..!!! For f*ck-sake!! Stop calling my house!!!!!", they'd get the point. Sometimes you really DO have to hit someone over the head with a shovel to get your message across. Then you have to dig a shallow grave, change your name to Chuck Ficklemeyer and move to Costa Rica. But the calls did stop... and the banana margaritas are amazing down here.
If I could just get this monkey to stop licking her butt before she makes out with me...
Ciao...
Kyle~
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