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posted 4/14/2008 2:49:32 PM |
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I sat in reception, my freshly dry cleaned suit buttoned to the top. I needed this job, I 'd phoned in sick to my current place just to take this interview. It was for a similar role but in a different field so they didn't compete with my existing employer.

The reception was drab and boring, pseudo modern shaped desk with white walls and a grey blue carpet together with pot plants: naf but trying hard not to be. Just like any other reception. The receptionist was filing her nails while she spoke on the phone.

"No I'm sorry he's in a meeting," she said as if reading from a cue card. "Could you call back in a few hours? That's lovely, thank you buh bye." She sighed as she put the phone down and continued filing and buffing.

"So where do you work for at the moment?" Her question cut straight through my nervous monotony and caught me off guard. I fumbled the answer, stuttering as my mental preparation was shattered.

"Oh I had a friend who worked there once. They're not very nice are they?" I gave a politically neutral response despite whole heartedly agreeing with her. Why do you think I'm here you silly cow? I'd been ten minutes early as etiquette dictated, now my interviewer was late by another fifteen. If I hadn't needed the change in company so badly I might have walked out by now. Actually, no I wouldn't. Interviewees should always be early, interviewers reserved the right to be late if they wanted to be. The two occasions I'd ever conducted an interview I'd been deliberately five minutes late. Just wish I didn't have to be sat here with this small talk loving moron of a receptionist. Couldn't she just leave me alone, or was it some mind game laid on by the company to throw me off guard? Relax, deep breathes, you'll be fine.

"Yeah I know," I hadn't even heard what she'd said.

The door to the stair well opened. It took all my self control to keep my jaw from hitting the deck. She was an inch shorter than me in her black heels. Her long dark hair was caught up at the back of her head with single heavy duty hair clamp, she was pretty with black framed glasses and a chunky necklace about her elegant neck. The top button of her white blouse was undone just betraying a subtle hint of cleavage beneath and her black pinstriped power skirt which just reached her knees was caught up with a narrow patent black leather belt.

She gave a business like smile as she held out her hand and introduced herself as Joanna. I mentally picked myself up as I rose from my chair. The hand shake. Most important moment of the interview. I returned the smile and delicately but firmly grasped her hand. With one hand.

Some people believe you should take a leading stance from the offset and lay your other hand over the top when you shake, but no. Such a dominant gesture is too early at this stage. After being offered the job? Maybe, but I wouldn't. First day? Always, puts your new comrades in their place.

She led me up the stairs to the second floor (NB that's the third floor to you yanks :P). Leading me along the corridor I barely listened to her pointing out the various departments, all I could pay attention to was her pert behind swaying to and fro as she walked! I tore my gaze away just as she turned at her office door.

“Do come in.” I followed meekly, like a loyal pet. She sat me in a chair and perched herself on the edge of the desk just in front of me, the toe of her stiletto shoe just inches from mine. I was fine for tea or coffee, thank you kindly.

“Very well,” she said and we began. The usual back and forth of questions and answers began, quite easy to the practiced mind, and to someone who knows the job inside out. We spoke about the market pace, the effect the economic climate was having on business, the competition, the bigger clients. I knew it all, but then I noticed out of the corner of my eye that the second button of her blouse had somehow come undone. Suddenly I was diverting a lot more of my attention to maintaining eye contact because what I could see, well, it was nice!
Anyhow, she had appeared not to have noticed so I relaxed a little and continued. The questions kept coming, about my present employer, the job I was doing for them. Difficulties I was having (no one has NO difficulties in a job….) and how I was overcoming them. And so on and so forth as she pushed herself back across the desk so she was sitting rather than perching. The opening of her skit lunged mercilessly at my attention. I’m sure I blushed slightly, struggling to maintain my composure and not stare at the fact that… Oh my god. Those weren’t tights she was wearing. Lace topped black stockings and just a hint of milky white thighs just above!

I stuttered and blushed out the end of my sentence as she crossed her ankles and gripped the edge of the desk on either side of her, pushing her almost exposed bust out further. She looked at me almost disapprovingly over the top of her spectacles.

“Impressive,” she said, as I focussed on her exquisite red painted lips. “Most impressive. You’ve researched the business well, and you clearly know the role. Your references are spotless at worst.”

“Th - thank you.”

“However, I cannot offer you the position.” I was stunned. It felt like I’d been shot.

“But you said yourself, I know the role and I’ve well researched the business. I don’t understand.”

“There’s nothing to understand I’m afraid, I just can’t offer you this job. There’s nothing I can do.”

“Nothing? But what have I been doing here all this time, why have I sat here? There must be something that can be done!” She sat in thought for a while, her unchanging expression regarding my desperation for a moment.

“Actually I think there might be something that could be done.”


“Stand up.” This was strange. But even so I stood. “Now come here.” There was barely two feet between us, so I took a small step forwards. “Closer,” she cooed. I took another step towards her, almost touching her now. “Now kneel down.” I was quite taken aback by this, I had no idea what to say. “Kneel down!” She commanded. I did as she said, staring up at her over her knees, my face painted with a look of blank confusion. She gave a faint half smile, “kiss my shoes.” It took a few more seconds for the penny to drop. But it dropped with a giant GUH - DUNCH!

I gave a tiny gasp of disbelief before taking her left foot in my hands, kissing gently at the leather, running my bottom lip down and then up the heel moving up towards her ankle, around the seem and then pausing briefly before gently brushing her ankle with my lips. She moaned her appreciation so taking that as a thumbs up I began slowly to let my kisses run higher towards her calf. I looked up and she was smiling through closed eyes as I reached the inside her knee. I continued with verve, pushing her skirt up and reaching the lace top of the stockin

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Interview Part II


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Apr 14 @ 3:14PM  
.....and then?

Apr 14 @ 3:38PM  
I can now see I have been conducting interviews all wrong

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