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7 Kinds of Sex

posted 3/25/2008 11:21:45 PM |
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tagged: sex, joke

The 1st kind of sex is called: Smurf Sex ..
* This kind of sex happens when you first meet
someone and you both have sex until you are
blue in the face.

The 2nd kind of sex is called: Kitchen Sex .
* This is when you have been with your partner
for a short time and you are so needy you will
have sex anywhere, even in the kitchen.

The 3rd kind of sex is called: Bedroom Sex ..
* This is when you have been with your par tner
for a long time. Your sex has gotten routine and
you usually have sex only in your bedroom.

The 4th kind of sex is called: Hallway Sex ..
* This is when you have been with your partner
for too long. When you pass each other in the
hallway you both say 'screw you.'

The 5th kind of sex is called: Religious Sex .
* Which means you get Nun in the morning, Nun
in the afternoon and Nun at night.(Very Popular)

The 6th kind is called Courtroom Sex .
* This is when you cannot stand your wife any
more. She takes you to court and screws you
in front of everyone.

And; Last, but not least,

The 7th kind of sex is called: Social Security Sex ..
* You get a little each month.
But not enough to enjoy yourself.
I have enough problems of my own.

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post a comment!


Mar 25 @ 11:31PM  
Thank god none of those fit me after 20 some years....

Mar 25 @ 11:36PM  

# 5 sound like the likd of meat a priest eats on friday. { NUN }

Mar 25 @ 11:37PM  
you forgot doggy style...he begs and she lays down and plays dead...

Mar 25 @ 11:39PM  
thats funny

Mar 26 @ 12:15AM  

Mar 26 @ 12:50AM  
so there is nothing good to look forward to after stage 3... i thought they were lying but to many confirmed posts that it only gets worse...

Mar 26 @ 1:47AM  

Mar 26 @ 2:12AM  
Very funny... Kudos for that one

Mar 26 @ 5:32AM  
What a SCREAM!!!! Real life can be very funny. Most of us has experienced at least some of these situations, and hopefully learned where things broke down so as not to repeat them in the future. What makes it so funny is that we survived them and can look back and laugh about it now. Thanks for the referesher course in life. Helps to keep those hard learned lessons front and center.

May 15 @ 7:26PM  
Most excellent! Never heard all these choices before. Ty and sweet.

May 20 @ 2:23PM  
Very funny but unfortunately, very true. Making it interesting and varied is what worked for me. I didn't want the sex to slow down or stop so I created things that worked for me and us. I put suggestive notes in his lunch, would call him at work and tell him what I wanted to do to him, after dinner I'd move the dishes, sit on the table in front of him with no panties and spread em wide. I was always giving him the "come on" and flirting. Yes, there were times when it didn't work, he didn't feel like or I didn't feel like it. But anything worth having is worth working for.

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7 Kinds of Sex