We made love because we just have to have each other and then we rested laying together catching a little sleep in each others arms, feeling totally complete and satisfied … slowly I awake while you're still sleeping beside me … with my head on one hand I just look at you … enjoying every little feature of this face I've been longing to see for so long now … with my index finger I start to trace its outlines … your sensual lips which you so unsuccessfully try to hide under your beard … the shadows below your eyes, showing off now that you've been working too hard the last time … the delicate lines of your eyebrows … the energetic ones of your chin, indicating how determined you can get … slighty brushing over your long, almost feminine eyelashes … following the retreating hair line, … yes, you and me are no longer in our twenties but it gives you this distinguished look, enhancing your being male, utmost masculinity … I see a little vein pulsating on your eyelid … it's slow "pock-pock-pocking" makes me want to kiss this cover of your incredible eyes … eyes I saw sparkling all the way over the ocean that divided us for so long … eyes that looked directly into my soul … eyes that I got lost in the first time I looked into them for real … I bend my head over your face a little and make sure my lips are warm and soft when I kiss these eyes …
Ring, ring, ring … your cell phone goes off! You're awake in an instant … sitting up and grabbing the phone is just one movement … take care, girl, that you don’t get hurt in this increadibly fast movement … "Yes", I hear you say, "okay, I'll be there, just give me 15 minutes" … that's what I love about you, taking decisions within minutes … "Babe, I need to help my son, his car broke down"… Sure, he needs a helping hand, it's your son, your family, your offspring, your flesh&blood … "Just hurry up, honey", I hear my huskyvoice, "if he needs a helping hand, off you go"! I even manage a smile, seemingly deceiving you enough to jump off the bed and get dressed … with an assuring "I'll be back, promise, as soon as I got this sorted out" and a blown kiss you're gone, leaving me behind more than half naked on the bed where we shared unbelievable pleasures … with a hard bang, the door closes behind you!
I lit a a cigarette … not too easy when you're crying, btw … again reassuring myself that I took all the right decisions on my way of life … yes, I was right to fly around half the world to meet you in person … yes, I was right in enjoying the lengthy exchange of thoughts, desires, wishes, needs and want-tos before booking this flight … and yes, I was right in deciding long ago that I don’t want to rise my so-called grandchild together with my own … yes, taking into consideration age, state of health and circumstances of living, at that time I was more than right in getting my tubes cut once and forever and I enjoyed the advantages of it quite a lot …
it just hurts once in a while coming in 2nd … standing no chance as blood seems always be thicker than love …
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