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I Just pissed in my trousers!The greatest scam/spam ever composed!

posted 2/27/2008 11:09:10 PM |
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  mica89

This is, without a doubt, THE most beautifully written NOVEL of a scam letter ever. To be sure. I wil first tell you that when I loked at "his" profile, he is 83 years old, 4'4" and weighs 215. This amazing piece of fiction contains intrigue, foul play, international smuggling, doublecross, car wrecks, death, a failed great escape,millions of dollars, oil, a clergyman.. and hopefully, some poor schmuck who believes that this "pastor" would choose AMD to find a partner. Hey- feel free to help him out. Thats a tempting amount of cash....
My name is Mr. Rev Paul Collins, I am a Ghanaian National, in West Africa.
It is with total trust and confidence that I make this business proposal to you. I was the former president of Ghana Petroleum Corporation. In the year 2003, A Briton by name Bill Burton, who has been my friend since 1994, by virtue of business relationship came to Accra, Ghana from London to buy crude oil as he had been doing in the past. Whenever he came, he always comes with huge sums, specifically in millions of dollars to purchase crude oil for export abroad.

During his last visit, Mr. Burton, in 2003, came with the sum of $35.5 million dollars in liquid cash [thirty five million five hundred thousand dollars cash].With my influence and political position as the president of the corporation then, I helped him lodge in the said amount in a finance house, DIPLOMATIC FINANCE; which I introduced to him in 1995. In 2003, two vessels belonging to Mr. Bill Burton was arrested in the high sea by the GHANIAN NAVY, loading crude oil without authorized license, to this end, both vessels were confiscated by the NAVY.

Based on the aforesaid, Mr. Bill Burton was traced and subsequently arrested and charged to court, I secured his release as a friend through my contacts. To my greatest surprise, few days after his release, probably for fear of being prosecuted in the court of Law, Mr. Burton ran away from Ghana without even saying a word to me or my lawyer who made his release possible.

Unfortunately, all efforts I have made to locate him since his escape has been in vain.
When I called his supposed residence in London, someone who claimed to be the new occupant of the house told me that he died alongside his wife and only child in a ghastly auto crash few weeks into his return to London, he warned me never to call the number or Residence again. I was particularly at a loss over what to do with his Funds.

Due to my inability to produce Mr. Burton, I was indicted, arrested and placed under house arrest since 2005 till date, pending when I could produce Mr. Burton in the court due to the fact that in his bail bound which I signed, I promise to produce him at any time he is needed in the court without knowing that he will run away; it might interest you to know that this situation jeopardized my Job as the President of the petroleum corporation, which was why I was relieved untimely too.

Since Mr. Burton’s death, no one has come up to claim the said funds as his next of kin. I have delegated investigations into his families and extended relatives and found none in existence; to this end, I have decided to evacuate and invest this money abroad, preferably in your country or any other country of your choice, pending my trial and release which my Lawyer is speedily working at. It will be highly appreciated if you can help me to achieve my aims because due to the restriction placed on my movement, I can not travel to operate a foreign account for the evacuation and investment of the money that is why I need your assistance.

Please be rest assured that this transaction is 100% risk free and must be treated with utmost confidentiality it deserves. Please acknowledge that no body knows about this money apart from you and me. Even the finance company where the money is lodged, does not know that the box contains money because the box was declared containing gold dust. I have decided to give to you 35% of the total amount for your assistance 5% will be for payment of tax when the money gets to your country as the law might demand while my balance 60% shall be invested in a joint business with you. Please I need your phone number for easy communication; I await your quickest response
( {email address removed})

Best regard
Rev Paul Collins

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Comments:

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Sunshine79

Feb 27 @ 11:11PM  
FUCK!! I can't click on the link....Keeps telling me "SYSTEM ERROR!"

ARRRGHHHHH!!!!
swyeter

Feb 27 @ 11:22PM  
All you are too late, I already sent the good rev my phone # and he called me collect. I already gave him my checking account number and the money should be in my account by tomorrow.

the short fat little fuck doesn't realize that I'm scamming his ass because once that money is in my account I'm keeping it all.
Sunshine79

Feb 27 @ 11:24PM  
Well, fuck, secrets out now, I want my part of the cash!!
Please acknowledge that no body knows about this money apart from you and me.

Gold dust???

What a tart....Using this kind of website to find someone......Geez.....How UNREAL!!
canuhelpme258

Feb 28 @ 3:24AM  
It was well written at least.. I was captivated... I was moved...

That letter touched me....
mica89

Feb 28 @ 4:01AM  
I cant WAIT for the movie!
I hear the Reverend is being played by who else? At 4'4" in the white suite coat.....it's..


rnj1013

Feb 28 @ 5:56AM  
What's even funnier is that my friend's dad got 1 of these letters from a woman from somewhere and believed her. He kept writing back to her for God knows how many months before I finally had to explain to her what "she" really was.
NachoBaby

Feb 28 @ 9:38AM  
Damn Mica you stole my line too.. I wanna see the movie.. I can see the whole epic picture.. it's gonna be monumental! Think we can get Sean Penn to direct?

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I Just pissed in my trousers!The greatest scam/spam ever composed!