(I'll change the story a little bit, concidering the holiday)
A doctor, lawyer, and biker walk into a bar, and all sit together at a table. Doctor orders a dry grey goose martini, shaken not stirred of course. The lawyer, a tanq + tonic with a twist of lime. The biker, a plain 'ol bud light.
Doctor takes a sip from his martini and says, "So for Valentine's Day, I decided to buy my wife two gifts, since she is the love of my life. A diamond tennis bracelet, and traded in her old BMW for a brand new one. I thought, if she doesn't like the bracelet, she's gonna love the car!"
Lawyer takes a drink from his T&T and says, "I did the same thing. I bought my beautiful wife of 7 years a new fur coat, and a trip to Paris. I figured the same thing. If she doesn't like the new mink, she'll love to go shopping in France!"
Biker takes a swig from his bland beer, and slams it on the table. "I bought my bitch of a wife two gifts also. A t-shirt from the local Hooters bar and a dildo. I figured... if she doesn't like the shirt, she can go fuck herself!!"
Happy Valentine's Day ladies!! 
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