AddThis Social Bookmark Button
Free Dating

How Can You Not Love Kids?

posted 1/30/2008 9:18:29 PM |
9 kudosgive kudos what's this?
    report abuse
tagged: joke

I received this in an email and it was just too good not to share! Every parent will be able to relate to this little stories!

I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the co nvertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"

On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now.
She's hitting the bottle."

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

5) POLICE # 1
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, "Are you a cop?"
"Yes," I answered and continued writing the report.
"My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?"
"Yes, that's right," I told her.
"Well, then," she said as she extended her foot toward me, "would you please tie my shoe?"

6) POLICE # 2
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me "Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked.
"It sure is," I replied.
Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, "What'd he do?"

While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fai ry will never believe this!"

A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."
"And why not, darling?"
"You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning. "

While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt.
Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.
The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his versi on of what he thought his father always said: "Glory be unto the Father, and unto the Son, and into the hole he goes."

A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"

A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out.
"What have you got there, dear?"
With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear."

Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)

   read more blogs!

Blogs by ladybootscooter:
Happy Easter Y'all!!!
Happy Fucking Friday Folks
Just a few thoughts of mine
Call me Crazy.........
Get Well Wishes Baby!!!
Bondage and Discipline (reposted in honor of Sex Saturday)
The price of living in paradise
The Flu SUCKS!!!!
Just another example of Irony
Superbowl ~ Joke
This says it all
Have I mentioned I hate snow???
How Can You Not Love Kids?
Confession is good for the soul
Twas the Day of Christmas
Astrology for Southerners
A Different Christmas Poem
Didja Ever????
Going Home.......
An Open Letter
The Nun and The Cabbie
When women lie
The new man in my life
Seven Months give or take 75 Miles
Sick Kiddo Update


post a comment!


Jan 30 @ 9:29PM  
Thanks Bootsy baby.. I needed that chuckle! Adams underwear.. my back yard is full of it!

Jan 30 @ 9:34PM  
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"

My daughter could have said that the first day she came home from pre-school. She was NOT a happy camper. I don't think it was a coincidence that she owned not one, not two, but THREE shirts that said "I'm talking and I can't shut up!"

Jan 30 @ 9:37PM  
I was so proud when my son said his first word (mama) at five months! I just had no idea he'd never shut up after that!!!!

Jan 30 @ 9:45PM  

a few of those really got to me....thanks for the blog, Stormy!!!!


Jan 30 @ 9:53PM  
Gotta love the innocence....

Jan 30 @ 10:31PM  
ladyboot thank you so much... have seen a few of those before and always laugh... we needed that today...

ps... green thing for ya... dont tell you know who...

Jan 30 @ 10:37PM  
* Thanks! Your secret is safe with me Christine!! *

Jan 30 @ 10:57PM  
Life through the eyes of kids...isn't it great?

*leaves a kudo....looks to make sure DeDe and Sum don't see it*

Jan 30 @ 11:07PM  
God I love the wisdom of children!!!


Jan 31 @ 1:25AM  
I loved reading each and everyone of them. I work with young children and not a day goes by without hearing a gem of a statement from these little professors. They also love to tell you everything that happens at home. Better be careful what you say and do in front of the kids.. they will share it all with us.

Jan 31 @ 3:12AM  
Kids are something!!!! Thx for shairing!

Jan 31 @ 3:12AM  

Jan 31 @ 5:48AM  

Jan 31 @ 6:48AM  
great way to start the day!

Jan 31 @ 9:16AM  
.. my back yard is full of it!

Ok, Ok ... If you have Adams undies in your back yard, whats Adam waring now? And just how large of a collection of men's shorts do you have anyway!

I'm not sure it's your back yard that's full of it either.

All right, quit screwin around, put the knife back in the drawer, Ok hun?

Jan 31 @ 9:53AM  
OMFG that's funny stuff! I love it. Kids are the most honest creatures in the world - when they're not talking to their PARENTS, that is.

Jan 31 @ 10:21AM  

Jan 31 @ 2:57PM  
I've got three...just when you are ready to strangle 'em, they say or do something to make you smile... . Thanks for that reminder that I DO love my kids.

Jan 31 @ 3:55PM  
You love kids LBS? I can send you some
Pretty funny though here's the last kudo I gots!

free dating | mission statement | testimonials | safety warning | report abuse | safe list | privacy | legal | 2257 | advertise | link to us

© Copyright 2000-2016 Online Singles, LLC.
How Can You Not Love Kids?