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The call...and a soft "I love you"......

posted 12/9/2007 8:19:15 PM |
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  GoDiva

The man I hunger for called me last night and told me in friendship confidances....that three women from his past are looking him up lately.

One out of the country that he lived for with a few months that came searching for him through the internet....she found him and he told me that she wants to get back with him. She is willing to come all the way from where she is from to give it another chance.

Two other local women that he has seen in the past has also connected with him again....one offering herself as a submissive wife and the other wants to "try it again" with him.

This is the conversation he started with me and still not sure why he really shared all of this except he has said we are friends and I give good advice. After talking a little about it he states he doesn't want to change anything in his life and not ready to have to answer to anybody right now, is how he put it. I have given him all of his freedom and lots of pleasure knowing this and it's not my desire with him......but I love him enough to let him be who he is right now and hope he might later see how wonderful I am.......which I am......

I am not so sure all of this is happening, but perhaps he's checking to see how I would react to such news.....sort of a check if my feelings for him are still there without saying he needs me or wants me. Just a little check to see if I am still connected.

I gave him advice, reaffirmed that he is a smart man and that he already told me that he is not ready for a relationship, at least not with me.......could be different with someone he has a history with. I told him my personal opinion, and how I felt is that I wouldn't go back to a past relationship......it's moot, it doesn't change anything, the growth you have taken on, will at least feel like a reversal. My opinion......

He invited me over and I went.....I had put him off a couple of times and I missed him. I have had no problem telling him that I miss him and that I do love him...but if the love isn't reciprocated, it's not validated.....I told him that honestly, he has never really kissed me and only reached for me twice when we are together.....

When I went over, I jumped into bed with him. it was early in the morning and we came together as natural as ever....nothing has changed....well, except he kissed me a little more and reached for me more than I am used to...to that is great! Honestly, I thought I would have changed because I felt our last time together was hurtful to me......it doesn't matter because I want to believe men make dumb mistakes, maybe even careless and we woman are so sensitive sometimes.....I am one of them....

I honestly think I heard him say I love you for the first time when we were together, but not sure.....does that count? Does an I love you count when you are in the middle of passion or sex? He is so careful otherwise, and I am hoping I heard him right......I made no big thing out of it.....I didn't ask.....I just enjoyed......

How many guys have done that? Whispered a secret I love you.......?

Please don't hesitate to comment......looking for advice. I am hanging in there with this guy, even though some mistakes on both our parts have been made....we've had long talks about such things......

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Comments:

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FUNGUY007

Dec 9 @ 8:32PM  
Don't hold you breath on this one.
GoDiva

Dec 9 @ 8:51PM  
Thanks for the comment...I am not believe me....

I still date, or have till recently. I have decided to stop meeting via internet.

Reason I still date others and I told him this is so I can balance out my feelings for him.....if I concentrated too much on him, I would not be able to give him the space he wants......

Ashinatrix

Dec 9 @ 8:57PM  
told me in friendship confidances....that three women from his past are looking him up lately.
Just goes to show, youre never too old to play games.........
Tool_Shed

Dec 9 @ 9:02PM  
He may have feelings for you, but his heart is definitely divided. I have, in the past, said the "L" word during sex, and even though I meant it in the friendship sense, I may not have meant it in the "in love" way. It is possible to love a lover and not feel as though you're "in love". I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling like that...nothing worse than carrying unrequited love for someone. Been there a few times. I hope it works out for you:)
scamper_juice

Dec 9 @ 10:28PM  
Diva...You lookin' good. Used to see you on another site. You definitely lookin' much better!

How about you and I gettin' a big buckett of rocks and then we will run that guy down the road! You need to get yerself a new feller! I would not put up with this bunghole playing the field....I say let's get thuh rocks!! [e32[
Sunshinegal35

Dec 9 @ 10:53PM  
It sounds to me like he's having his cake and eating it, too. Like Ash said, some people are never too old to play games.
My last boyfriend had no problem saying, "I love you" during sex. He just had a problem saying it when we were out of bed.
Anyway, that is neither here nor there. Just be cautious. Don't let him get hold of your heart until you're sure he's done with his other conquests!
Detach

Dec 10 @ 1:34AM  
I don't think it's a test, but rather he's being up front with you as to what king of bullshit may come from his past to bite him on the ass. He wants you to know so you are prepared and understanding as he endures their attempts to get back with him.

I am also in a situation where a woman from my past is planning to come back. She says she's just picking up some of her stuff and I hope that is all. However, if she were to want to get back together, I would of course take her back. But at the same time, I wouldn't tell the woman I am currently with. I would just break up with her after I have confirmed that the woman from my past wants to get back together. That being said, I think your current guy only has your best interests and trust in mind when he confronted you with his girl dilemma.

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The call...and a soft "I love you"......