As many of you know whenever I feel lonely and feel the need for solace, I attend funerals...doesn't seem to matter if I know the deceased,,,its just the ambeonce I desire. Yesterday I put on my sunday best and of course a pair of red satin Macho Panties and was standing in respectfull reverence by the grave site with thirty other mourners when suddenly a small slightly wet fart escaped from my ample buttocks. I thought nothing of it as it didn't draw much attention however my compulsion to laugh reared it ugly head again when suddenly the acrid odor of burning hair filled my nostrils. I scanned the crowd looking for the source of the odor when suddenly a women next to me screemed and pointed toward my crotch. To my horror, I observed smoke billowing from my trousers and almost immediately felt the searing heat in my nether regions. Without hesitation and to the indignant protestations of the crowd, removed my pants to find my Macho Panties completely involved in bright orange flames. When I awoke in the hospital all my hair was gone except for half my moustache. As a result I am recalling all Maco Panties with fulll refunds until the problem can be fixed.....Your Humble Servant ...Sir Professor Borty ....and my I also take this opportunity to apologize for any inconvenience to my customers.... 
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read more blogs!
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Looking4ever
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Dec 3 @ 8:17AM
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Dayum, baby! We really got to find you a woman...
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nolimitholdum
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Dec 3 @ 8:20AM
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NO COMMENT  good blog 
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Ewe_Wish
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Dec 3 @ 8:30AM
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I just knew it was too good to be true..........do you realize how many of those Macho Panties I sent out for christmas gifts...............damn I am now going to have to notify them before they use them...........and Now i will have to shop for other gifts...........damn.........wish you had run a test run on these prior to my order................Oh hell I sent LilGriz's to him early too..........anyone have his phone number.........this may be a might important for him to know......... 
Great Blog........Hope the burns heal up quickly.............
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borty293
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Dec 3 @ 8:38AM
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It's those damn lithium batteries.... 
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Dominus
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Dec 3 @ 9:18AM
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I told you not to have those things made in China.
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NachoBaby
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Dec 3 @ 9:21AM
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Dear Prof. Borty,
We, in QC, warned you against purchasing that lot of lithium ion rechargeable battery packs from IBM earlier this year. We figured they were the recalled packs that were bursting into flames.
Maybe next time you will listen to the people you hired to do the research?
Sincerely,
QC PantiesRUs
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borty293
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Dec 3 @ 9:25AM
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Ya but Dominus ....Ben knew a guy who knew a guy ...just seemed converient at the time.... 
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borty293
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Dec 3 @ 9:28AM
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Yes sorry Nacho....next time I will listen to you ...particularly when you force me to the floor and have your way with me.... 
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Lisa46
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Dec 3 @ 10:07AM
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OMG good thing I didn't fart when I wore mine  they are in the mail but umm I hadn't washed them yet 
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jezzarae
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Dec 3 @ 12:59PM
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well darn there you go and mess my christmas list up. Soooooooooooooo are your blinky ones still available and can I get them in christmas colors???
Of course I expect a discount for my inconvenience.....
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StraddleMyNose
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Dec 3 @ 3:50PM
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OMG, I needed a good laugh for today! A kudo thrown your way.
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Sunshinegal35
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Dec 3 @ 5:42PM
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Just the vision of you, standing graveside, with your crotch on fire made my drink come out my nose!
Thanks for the chuckle....
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Sweet_N_SaSSyTNgal
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Dec 3 @ 6:06PM
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I thought that said..."Nacho Panties" at first glance.
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sugarnspice005
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Dec 3 @ 7:53PM
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Sorry...I was TRYING to feel some concern and all...but,
Good blog!!!!
*sneaks a green thing-a-ma-jiggy on the table....looks around to make sure DeDe didn't see*
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bentan
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Dec 3 @ 8:07PM
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"I geeeeve you good price ... goooooood price!" was what he kept tellin' me.  
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