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When Do You Feed A Baby?

posted 10/13/2007 11:54:21 PM |
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tagged: family, babies, food

Hello all. I know it's been a while since I've been on, but for obvious reasons I'm very busy these days. My little man Grant is now two months old (almost, this Tuesday) and getting bigger and sweeter by the minute. We're very proud of him. His big Sissy Becca loves him beyond belief. She is convinced he is her brand new real-live baby doll that Santa Claus brought her. To see the two of them together is beyond sweet.

Coming to the issue at hand: When do you feed a baby?

Well, the answer should be painstakingly simple, should it not? Of course. You feed a baby when it's hungry. How much do you feed it? You feed it until it gets full! Right? Of course.
Why then, does every one in my life feel the need to tell me how to feed my child? My child weighed eight pounds and eleven ounces when he was born. I nursed him for the first three weeks he was here. He nursed ALL the time. I could not keep up with him. It seemed he was an extension of me. I had no time for my other child or anything else for that matter. I finally gave up with much pushing from my husband and put him on formula. He's done extremely well on the formula; he's been taking six ounces every three or four hours or so. Which, I am assured by his pediatrician that this is perfectly normal. I am also assured that I am supposed to count those hours from the time he STARTS feeding. So if he starts at say, four p.m. - he is due to eat again around seven. It doesn't matter if he didn't finish until five- he is still due to eat again at seven.
I am straying from my point. The other day I was visiting with my mother in law and my son was eating. He ate six ounces of formula and was still hungry. This is not abnormal. It has been nearly four hours since he had eaten. I went into her kitchen and fixed another two ounces for him to eat. She was holding my son and I handed her the bottle and she looked at me and informed me that there was no way he could still be hungry with as big of a bottle that he just ate.
Oh? How the hell does she know that? I am with my son twenty four hours a day, seven days a week. I'm the one that knows the signs of his hunger. He does three things when he is hungry: He roots, He sucks his fist vigorously, and He cries. When he is still hungry, he roots and sucks his fist, although not so vigorously. Which, he was doing. She gave him the bottle and he begin drinking with gusto.
He was still drinking the bottle and she pulled it away from him with an ounce left. She said she didn't think he wanted it any more.
I knew he wanted it. I heard his lips pop when she seperated the bottle from him. I got my son and the bottle and allowed him to finish. When he was finally finished he fell asleep and slept for hours. Babies have a need for their formula to INCREASE as they get bigger. People seem to overlook or not care about that in this family. While he was sleeping she, in not so many words, accused me of overfeeding him. I informed her that if I was overfeeding him then it was my business, in not so many words, of course, and that I would much rather overfeed him than to let him go hungry.

Looking back through my blog, my daughter also took six-seven ounces of formula every three hours at this stage. She didn't increase formula consumption until she was around four months old, but she was a much smaller baby - weighing nearly two pounds less than my son. I fed her and took care of her and in my humble opinion, did a fabulous job. She is three now and every pediatrician visit we have had I have been informed that she is in perfect health. She has never a day in her life been 'overfed' or underfed - for that matter.

Also, my son has been known for falling asleep on his bottle. He is still only a little baby, and gets drowsy often. At times he will only finish four ounces, so he will wake up an hour or two hours later, hungry. I will, of course, feed him. I will not let him go hungry. He usually only finishes the amount he didn't finish in the first place. Sometimes he will take more, and sleep more between feedings. Many members of my husband's family feel the need to pipe up and say "Didn't you just feed him an hour ago?" or "Is he really hungry again?" To which I would like to stand up and tell them "It's none of your f-ing business when, where, how much, and what he eats! Do you want me to let you know how often he shits and farts too!?!!!???! He might be doing too much of that for your taste!" But I calmly inform them that if they hadn't finished their dinner, they'd be hungry for a snack or something else a bit earlier too, now wouldn't they?

My husband tells me he doesn't want our son to be fat. He has struggled with his weight all of his life and he is a big man. To which I tell him: "He is a BABY. He is supposed to be fat!" He is perfectly proportioned for his length. He is nearly twenty three inches long and weighs twelve pounds. Everything for him is right on target. I want to look at my husband and inform him that I did a fabulous job with our daughter, and she is NOT fat. I want to tell these people that I got this covered, I can handle this all by myself. I don't need their OPINIONS. I have a FACT sheet from my pediatrician. Which, by the way, his last appointment he was PERFECT! But I am deathly afraid my hillbilly-white-trash mouth will start to curse them if I delve into that conversation with them.

Continued on comments~

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Oct 13 @ 11:54PM  
They say things like "I never remember Becca eating that much" or "I never remember Becca being almost twelve pounds at two months" and at that point I am pissed and I remind them that I never remember Becca being born with a third leg either. Grant is a DIFFERENT baby.
So.. when do you feed a baby? And what would YOU do if you were me? Curse them out one good time and tell them to eff off and mind their business and let them get over it? That's what I'd love to do. Because they just don't get the picture. It makes me feel like a bad mother for feeding my hungry child. I should add, as well, that my son is not a baby who will eat just because you give it to him. He will shove it away or pull his head away when he doesn't want any more. Ack! I hate dealing with stupid people. WWYD? What would YOU do?


Oct 14 @ 12:01AM  
Kris- I went thru this same thing when my son was a baby! Seens everyone is just overflowing with advice- especially when you didn't ask for it!
Take a deep breath- thank that person for his/her concern, and keep doing what YOU think is best for your baby. After all, you brought him into this world, and that makes you THE most qualified to take care of him!

Oct 14 @ 12:04AM  
Seems that sometimes family butts their noses in a bit too much!! Just follow your heart hun, you are a great mom, and you know your son!! Congrats by the way!!

Oct 14 @ 12:15AM  
that is why breastfeeding is one else can measure it, count it, or interfere with it...

dont forget, if a baby gets sick (as one of mine did at 5 months), they can lose quite a bit of weight rapidly, they need a bit stored...

Oct 14 @ 7:37AM  
My daughter was a premie, at birth she weighed 2 lbs 6 oz... and a year she weighed in right around 12 pounds. She is 8 now and only weighs about 44 lbs. I hear all the time that I must be starving her, from strangers. But from her doctor, we hear she is perfectly healthy and the perfect weight... FOR HER!! The only people that matter in this equation are Grant, his pediatrician and YOU.. screw everyone else. Smirk at them and go on doing what you are doing.

Oct 14 @ 8:53AM  
Thank goodness I didn't get pestered about what my youngest son ate.... I had the same problem... had to stop breast feeding him... I couldn't keep up with him.

The only good advice I got came from my father, these were the two things...

1) babies that sleep during the day will keep mom awake at night.

2) for feeding.. don't feed until the baby is really hollering for food... make him wait an extra few minutes.. exercise those lung and make sure that he will really eat... and not fall asleep during feeding.

My youngest son was only 6 lbs when he was born.. however he became a chubby baby....slimmed out as a toddler and quite average as he grew... Now.. 22 year old with a really buff body...he's never had a problem with his weight.

However my 24 years old was the same weight... slim baby as was a month premature and very slim for years and years.... now grown up... he has probably 15 extra pounds however not a weight issue.

Oh yeah, the youngest... I had to put him on food at four months... he was eating a huge bowl of porriage at that ate... I was amazing how much he ate... he ate more than me!!

The older son as a baby was so hungry that he would just go through bottle after bottle of formula constantly..... constantly changing his diaper... he went on food really early...

I found out later that apparently what I did, feeding food and stuff ... was all wrong... too earlier ... wrong type of food... per the experts... however....

they have no allergies of any sort... food or anything...

no health issues...including weight...

In the end, mother's were given instincts for a reason .... trust your instincts!!


Oct 14 @ 9:00AM  
It never fails....Everyone always wants to impress you with how much more they know about babies than are doing the right thing...keep it up...When my boys were babies, we had the same problem with everyone telling my wife how/what/when to fed I began to run interference for her...after a few times of ME telling them that SHE was the mother, and it was HER decision, not their's....they backed off and let her it's time for hubby to talk to your in-laws...

Oct 14 @ 9:11AM  
Hey sweetie you do what YOU think best for YOUR baby!!! And remember everyone is trying to help not tell you what to do!

Oct 14 @ 9:20AM  
Hel advice is like something else that starts with an A and everybody has one my kids are 16 and 18 and people are still telling me what im doing wrong gotta do what you think is right ........

Oct 14 @ 1:34PM  
My Monkeybaby, you do what you think is best!!! Every baby is NOT the same, everyone of them eat differently!! My son was almost 10 lbs, he breast fed for 3 months, and believe it or not, it was not enough and had to give him a bottle!

At 2 months old he ate almost 8 to 10 ounces each feeding! Its not how much, its what they want. Babies all grow and differently, so feed away babe, your doing a fine job!!!! Hes not crying cause of a belly ache, or puking so do what is best for him!

By the way, glad your back, missed you honey!!! and kiss da baby for me!!

Oct 14 @ 1:56PM  
Looks like you're a wonderful mom doing a wonderful job. Don't let the in laws get to you.

And kudos to a good mommy.

Nov 1 @ 7:17AM  
Hey Monkey,
Every child is different, at 9 months my youngest (now nearly 9) was having 4 bottles a day and 5 solid feeds a day, my mum told me I was feeding him too much, so I just asked if she was going to get up and give him a bottle every 2 hours during the night, and now he is your normal, skinny energetic kid and has not got a weight problem from being over fed as a baby.
At the end of the day you know your son and you know what he needs, as for telling the inlaws where to go, I would have already done that if I was in your shoes, because I did the same with my ex mother inlaw.

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When Do You Feed A Baby?