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posted 10/12/2007 2:27:46 AM |
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I have just discovered a very disturbing trend on the internet and feel it is my duty to warn the community on AMD. There are several reports of women getting pregnant from both cybersex and phone sex. How can this be possible Professor Borty, you may ask. The only explaination I can cum up with is that sperm is somehow attaching itself to electrons and traveling down the information highway to your eggs

I have been spending many hours in the panty lab and have discovered a latex spray that can be easily applied to panties thus eliminating any hope of these sperm laiden electrons from entering the nether regions. All you need to do is send your panties to Professor Borty and I wlll personally apply the spray in my panty lab and return them to you as soon as possible. Please do not hesitate as time is of the essence....your spiritual advisor...Sir Professor Borty...

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Blogs by borty293:
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Oct 12 @ 2:45AM  
I see another ploy to gather panties!

Oct 12 @ 2:46AM  
I wish you had told me this months ago, but I am now the proud mother of a bouncing baby...........................

But to make sure this doesnt happen again, cause I do enjoy phone sex, I will be shipping you a package of my panties for you to spray.

Kudos Prof. Borty................I am afraid this is the last one I will be able to give you before I crown the new kudo whore...............


Oct 12 @ 3:26AM  
Dear Sir Professor Borty..

And how long has it been that you have been 'hiding' this information from us? Damn it you really should have let me know before we....


Oct 12 @ 4:10AM  
Thank goodness I don't choose to engage in cyber sex or phone sex. The last time I tried cyber sex, I got lost in cyber space and was propositioned by a rough looking prostitute with a HUGE adam's apple. As far as phone sex goes, I'm a safety girl, and I couldn't find a condom large enough to fit the receiver. Go Figure!

I will pass along a Kudo for the great info. It just might put a hault to the growing number of illegitimate cyber babies.


Oct 12 @ 6:34AM  

Okay Borty, IF I did phone or cyber sex, I would be concerned.
However, you already have like about 76 pair of mine already for various reasons. And I just happened to get an email from eBay the other day that was a notice to all women about a man selling womens previously owned, already worn panties and how they were just being bought at an alarming rate and IF we knew him that they appreciated our generosity.The letter also stated that he had quickly become a multi-millionaire through them and as much as they enjoyed their cut of this wealth, they had put his selling on a stand still until recently.They just could not handle the heat that his auctions were generating. Now with a new program they can keep up again and his panty business with them is in full bloom.
This wouldn't happen to be you, by chance. Would it?
My attorney said to find out for sure, before we file a lawsuit for part of your earnings. And could you please turn over a copy of your W-2's from eBay? This would be so very helpful.
However if you tell me it's not you, I guess I am going to have to believe you. At least til the situation can be investigated.

Oct 12 @ 7:54AM  
Professor Borty, and I do mean THE distinguished Professor Borty, I will be eternally grateful to you for this piece of information!

Oct 12 @ 8:17AM  
I don't do cyber sex.

I don't do phone sex.

I don't wear panties.

Oct 12 @ 8:46AM  
I don't wear panties.
A woman after my own heart!!
I only have one question, why would you have your panties on while having either cyber or phone sex? It all sounds a lil silly to me. I think it's a Canadian plot. Whaddya mean I'm paranoid? Whaddya mean I'm nothing more than a conspiracy theorist? It's a Canadian plot I tell you! You just can't trust a country who isn't at war with anybody. Beware those phony pantie shield claims, anyone with a half a brain should know they're scams.



Oct 12 @ 10:14AM  
Thank goodness I don't cyber

Oct 12 @ 11:37AM  

I'm thinking a Nobel Prize in research ought to go to borty! But watch out, you'll have stiif [pun intended] competition from Al Gore 'cause, as everyone knows- he invented every fucking thing on this planet- or so I've read and heard!


Oct 12 @ 12:29PM  
OMG and I thought it was cause I swallowed a watermelon seed........

Oct 12 @ 3:23PM  
Hmmm latex panties eh??? *runs off to find a way to get stitch rippers shrunk down to sperm size*

I must cyber spawn...

Oct 12 @ 11:27PM  

You cic not mention the fact they were safe with oral.
A woman can not get pregnant from oral sex.

Oct 13 @ 1:55AM  
Professor Borty,
I can't possibly afford to purchase any more panties to ship to you for this application! I've bought new panties several times now as you have all my old ones! Bras too! With each shipment you have promised to return them with either clit enlargers, nipple enlargers or explosive "no grabbing" devices installed. I watch daily for the little brown UPS man to bring them back but to no avail! Having said this could you please just spray those you have and ship them all back post haste? Your cooperation in this matter is appreciated.
Your finest customer

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