I am sitting here this morning looking at a photo of the last true interest I had in my life. She was my best friend long before she was a lover, and now we don't even talk. Not like we used to at one time I thought she was the best thing to happen to me. I don't allow myself to get close to women in that way as it can be detrimental, and besides the closer you get the more questions there are.
Ones like ..... Where do you go all the time?, Why do you leave so suddenly when you get a call? And the grandaddy of them all. What is it you really do?
Back to GiGi ( I'll call her that for obvious reasons) I really do miss her at times. Her smile, Her laugh, Her touch, and most of all her conversation. There is a big age diference betwween us but that never mattered to either of us. I know she deserves more than I could ever give her, but damn there are times when I want to tell her everything. I could never subject her to that...here again I am thinking I deserve to be happy too. I have dedicated the last 26 yrs to my job and I think maybe I deserve more.
I sometimes think that my solitude is a punishment for the choices I made in life.
I did everything they told me, in fact I still do I don't hesitate, I don't question never have. Now though I question alot of things frequently
Share your regrets,and thoughts on this
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