I'll Never Forget It Again---I HOPE posted 8/29/2007 4:23:17 AM | 1 kudo what's this?     report abuse

casuallylooking

Earlier today--Well actually yesterday now---, when Ynot did his blog about the cops remarks I laughed thinking about one time when I got pulled over, and it was the most embarrassing night in my life.
Then I read WoW's post about the line and it made me think of it again. Just a different kind of line. So,since I can finally laugh about it....
A few years back a friend going through a break up called me and asked me to meet her at a bar about 15 miles from me. I said okay. It wasn't an actual restaurant but they had a kitchen and you could get food until about 9pm. And we both knew the owners. We met, had dinner and talked for a few hours.
Right across the street is a grocery store and everyone knows it's a good place for cops to sit.
I left the bar a little after 1. Plugged my cell phone into the car charger and laid it on the seat. Turned right out of the parking lot, and hit a small pot hole in the road.Damn. My phone fell off the seat wrapping the cord around my gear shift and I needed to shift to third. Normally I would have pulled the cord and dropped it to the floor, but there wasn't another car on the street, cept the cruiser in the store lot. Another pot hole, but this time I swirved to miss it and leaned just a little to get ahold of the cord close to the phone and pulled it quickly, never taking my eyes off the road. When I pulled over and the officer asked me how much I had to drink, I told him all I had all night was diet pepsi. And that I swirved to miss the pot hole not because I had been drinking.He could check with the bar owners. He asked me if I could walk a straight line. I told him No. I had messed up my knee and it was hurting and I couldn't walk any straight line, but I had an orthopedic surgeon who would vouch for that.(Yeah like they're going to get ahold of him right then.) But I swear I haven't been drinking and I can pass the ummm uhh, the oh shit, the you know. Uhh , sigh, that uhh, that blow test thingy. (Oh Dear God, tell me I didn't just say that.) All I could do was put my hand across my brows to cover my eyes to keep from seeing him, look down towards the floor shaking my head and tell him " Just take me to jail now, please just don't make me look at you. That or just shoot me." To which I think I heard him laugh quietly.
He asked me if I was still willing for him to check with the bar owners about what I had been drinking all night. I told him yes. He handed me back my license and told me that I needed to uncover my eyes and look up to be able to drive home. He told me to be careful and no more swirving for anything. He followed me about 5 miles. I'll bet he was laughing his ass off the whole time.
I couldn't think of the word sobriety test that night to save my life. Evidently not my dignity either. Now it's funny, well kinda sorta..... Not so much then.

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