I'm sure we all remember being dragged off the mall as children when Mom wanted Christmas pics of her offspring with Santa to proudly display & pass out to friends & family.
Well, in my case,...waiting in line to see Santa with my huge list of toys & things I must have for Christmas, the suspense was over-whelming.Wiping the sweat off my brow with the fears I might forget something, ( being the little greedy bastard I was as a child ) as I patiently waited my turn sweating with that HUGE nylon , furry hooded parka Moms' used to make us wear ,..like we were going to the North Pole ourselves.Finally it was my turn & as I greeted Santa with a nice smile & hopped up on his lap to inform him on my needs & wants, all of the sudden, I felt an unusual lump near my butt !
I looked at Santa with a raised eye-brow & he winked at me ! I felt this odd formation throb once or twice & finally realized what it was ,...and it was NO candy cane !
I immediately jumped up & yelled, Santa's gotta a boner " !! My mother was mortified & the Elves that were helping pt Santa, ran over & tried to cover my mouth as I was wisked away in a wild frenzy! Needless to say, this cause quite a comotion.
Anway, I didn't get 1 damn thing on my list, however, we did have a freeezer full of Venison & Santa had to walk that Christmas.Ho friggin Ho Santa, you de-ranged lunatic ! He's probably been on Dateline's " To Catch a Predator",.....LOL
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Blogs by guitarguy878:
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| A Christmas Poem " Santas' Boner " |
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