AddThis Social Bookmark Button
Free Dating

The NFL and the NASCAR Rule

posted 8/9/2007 10:08:10 PM |
0 kudosgive kudos what's this?
    report abuse
  Wordsofwit

I reside in a suburb of Dallas, Texas . After months of hibernation, the area will come to life at 8:00 eastern tonight when the Dallas Cowboys host the Indianapolis Colt on national TV at Texas Stadium (about four miles from my home). I am a San Francisco 49er fan and my second favorite team is whoever is playing the Cowpies.

Last Memorial Day, I was down in the Galveston area partying with a group of friends and there was a NASCAR race on. I have no interest in that at all and many of the other 15 or so people didn’t either.

I told my favorite NASCAR joke that was done by Jay Leno: In order to expand their audience demographics, NASCAR will attempt to appeal to a new audience by marketing two private label wines. One is predominantly merlot and the other chardonnay. They will be offered as Red Neck and White Trash.

One woman asked why the cars were going around the track so slowly. It was explained that they were running under caution. She asked if the laps counted and was told that they were. I quipped, “To me that is kind of like playing a football game and when someone is injured, the game continues but you walk through the plays and they count.”

I obviously remembered that, so when the opportunity came to amuse myself with some humor, I seized the opportunity.

Earlier in the week, just before dinner, I parked myself in front of the TV and turned it on. The NFL Network came on (I had been watching tributes the night before to the late, great former 49er coach, Bill Walsh). They were showing a full pads scrimmage involving the Green Bay Packers. My roommate/housekeeper came up to serve me my dinner and glanced at the TV (she has zero interest in, or knowledge of, sports of any kind).
“Who’s playing?”
“The Green Bay Packers”
That’s the green team?” I nodded in the affirmative.
“Who’s the other team?”
“The Green Bay Packers” She was momentarily puzzled.
“You mean, they’re playing THEMSELVES?” I nodded in the affirmative. We watched a receiver catch a pass on a deep post and everyone slowed down to a trot. “He didn’t try to run and nobody tried to knock him down.”
“There’s a new rule going in this year to speed the game up. It’s called the NASCAR rule. In NASCAR, if there is a wreck, they usually don’t stop the race. What they do is run under caution. All of the cars slow down to about 70 miles per hour and continue. The laps count towards the race. On the play before that one, a player got injured. So, under the NASCAR rule, you just of sort of walk through the plays, and they count.”
“Anything that can speed up the game is an improvement.” She then retired to her bedroom and I proceeded to channel surf in hopes of finding something worth watching.

Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)

   read more blogs!

Blogs by Wordsofwit:
Geriatric Jokes Part 1
Whales - My FAVORITE Joke
Kan U Spell - Survey
The First Thing that You Did to Get Sent to the Principal’s Office? - Tommy
Guys' Profiles and Essay Responses...the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
"Leave it to Beaver" and Poop Butt Chicken - Tommy
Assorted Jokes
Uncommon Denominators
Female 40-60 AMD Demographics
Another Advantage to Blogs
Tit 4 Tat
The UnBEARable Truth
The NFL and the NASCAR Rule
Popeye Is Not Gay…
Gump the Chump
Mother's Liberation
Trees
The Fork in the Road, Turning Around, and Flying into the Unknown
The Hibernating Hermit


Comments:

post a comment!

NachoBaby

Aug 9 @ 10:26PM  
Yer a snot! I just want you to know that.. and I luv ya. BTW.. I dig football.. I especially like when the goalie makes a home run!

(that was bullshit btw.. in case you didn't already get that.. )
buatbu

Aug 9 @ 10:28PM  
But if it is a walk through. less people will be injured.
TattooedRawkStar

Aug 9 @ 11:55PM  
Hockey rules. Other sports are for sissies who can't hit.
your_lover38

Aug 10 @ 1:17AM  
Dammit!! This means I have to give up my affinity towards table tennis and lacrosse????????? Fencing just won't be the same!!! Drat it all!!! Speed Skating and Ski Jumping by the wayside??
Ewe_Wish

Aug 10 @ 2:20AM  


Wordsofwit

Aug 10 @ 7:53AM  
Growing up, for a couple of weeks every summer, my little brother and I were packed up and shipped off to my grandparents. One evening, I guess I was about nine, I was watching a boxing match with my grandfather. My grandmother called to me from the kitchen. I went in and she had a bowl of ice ream with homemade chocolate sauce on it with walnuts. Yum!! Not only that, I could eat it the living room, something verboten at home.
"Are you having a good time with grandpa?"
"Yeah, we're watching the fights!"
"Your grandpa, loves watching the fights. Are there some good ones?"
"Yeah, they are pretty good. We don't get to watch them at home. My mom hates them."
"Fights are a man's thing."
"The next one is real important, because grandpa and I have bet."
"A bet!?!"
"Yeah, a quarter."
"Dont you ever make a bet with him! That god damned fight happened last night and he already knows who the hell won!!" She then marched into the living room and read him the riot act.
40DWM

Aug 10 @ 9:08AM  
NASCAR = Non Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks

I still miss Alan Kulwicki....the Hooters guy that after he
won, would do the Polish Victory lap (drive around the track in reverse).

Ashinatrix

Aug 10 @ 12:39PM  
OMG!!!!!!!
Where am I???? The Soviet Union?????
Ya'll just eat my dust!!!!
High octane entertainment is HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nuthin' makes me more wet than the roar of a big engine!!!!


darthmaul

Aug 10 @ 12:59PM  
NASCAR = Non Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks

I'd like to see y'all drive a car at 180 mph for 500 miles around a 2.5 mile oval in 100 degree+ heat in a nomex fire suit and NO A/C.
Fckmhrdtnght

Aug 11 @ 7:42AM  
Hockey rules. Other sports are for sissies who can't hit.

I'm Canadian -- HOCKEY RULES....
StraddleMyNose

Aug 12 @ 4:47AM  
I'm not a nascar fan, but I love NFL football. I can see why you love San Fran, the team of the 80's. I liked them too behind my Bengals. My Bengals only went to two Super Bowls. Both of them were against San Fran. in Jan. of '82 and Jan. '89, and we lost them both. As for my Bengals, hopefully we'll have a great team that can go all the way this season.
dridge

Aug 16 @ 8:57PM  
I'll have to say anything and I do mean anything that would speed up a football game nowadays would be welcome in my view. The game has 4 15min quarters which equals 1 hour, simple math. Then why does it take 3-4 hours to play a game? Seems like a lot of time wasted with unnecessary BS. In the 50's and 60's the game never took 3-4 hrs., but rule changes through the years has expanded the game to ridiculous extremes. I know there will be those that disagree with my assessment that a game takes 3-4 hours but I've seen plenty that do. If MLB played under similar rules as the NFL then 9 innings would take a week. Yes by all means bring pro football back in line with what it used to be, speed it up so a 1hr game plays out in 1 1\2 to 2hrs max.

free dating | mission statement | testimonials | safety warning | report abuse | safe list | privacy | legal | 2257 | advertise | link to us

© Copyright 2000-2014 Online Singles, LLC.
OS-WEB01
The NFL and the NASCAR Rule