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Do You Know Me?

posted 8/4/2007 8:26:52 PM |
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  Pudge2you

"...well Pudge, he did say to use it unwell. This is WCANU radio, I'm Mestopholes, now some music for ya! ... "

*Music comes up*

"Here's one for the ladies... Summertime, sit back, need somethin to keep you cooool... Oh yeah..."

*sound of stations flipping between blips of talk, music and white noise... finally stopping on a station playing a commercial*

Hello, do you know me?

Sure I'm an infamous comment sniper with second grade run 'n' gun tactics who primarily picks on the prominent women of this site, but there's more to me than that.

I get up every morning kiss my Mom on the lips per family tradition, jump on here for a round of sniping, fix my comb-over, then rush off to the gym for some reps and manly attention, if ya know what I mean...

Then it's off to work in my dead weight middle management position where I get paid for sitting up straight, which can be hard to do after my workout regimen. Yeah, long hours of taking up space and bossin' the bitches ya know what I mean?

Then after work it's a quick stop at GNC to get my supplements then home for a meal with Mommy. Seems like paradise don't it? But I've got dreams too.

I've been into oral and anal sex every since my 16 month reign as Alter-Boy Supreme. It was hard work but I learned to love it. I mean, to this day between Church and the Gym, I've got no time for chattin up the bitches, these holes need a rest if ya know what I mean. But my true dream is to go to the very Seat of my clan, the place where the skills I have learned have been taught and appreciated literally for centuries. One day I'm gonna go to Rome and meat the Pope. After all St. Peter's got nuthin' on me, just ask the boys at Vespers.

But despite my hard earned popularity, to many I'm simply an obscure belly crawling, South American forest dwelling member of the Lachesis clan. That's why I carry the Asshole Express card. This way everywhere I go I get the respect I deserve, so long as I'm a good bottom that is.

"The Asshole Express Card, don't leave yer Mommy and crawl outta yer hole without it. Otherwise they won't use jelly."

*Fade to white noise*

Seriously dude... there's no way that profile is real. No self-respecting, dedicated Out-Q listener like yourself would post a body building profile from freaking Wayne, NJ. Who the fuck are you? Franz? "Here me now believe me later...." It's just too cliche` and easy. So ya come around here to pick on girls. What a loser. Pick skinny little me, you fucking girly man.

After walking around in your mind for this breif while I think I need a shower you fucking coward. Next time instead of kissin yer Mommy you ought to punch her in the fucking mouth for helping to raise such a pathetic cyber reprobate as yourself, you fucking waste of hard drive space. I know you won't comment here because you're not man enough to "Bring It" like some before you. Or maybe then again you're busy at the gym, or Vespers. Hope ya brought your own lube this time...

*Sound of radio switching off and footsteps fading away*

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   read more blogs!

Blogs by Pudge2you:
The Pot...
Answers....
Grumps on Sumps and Other Wisdom...
Fahhhhhh Q!!!
Happy New..... wait a miniute...
Change...
This Blog is Ticking...
Part 3: Phallic Soliloquy...
The Pervian Playground Anal-oh-gee!
Regurgitation.... WoW style...
I think it's great...
Times That Try Pervian Souls...
Do You Know Me?
The Debrief...
Mosaic...
Bait and Switch...
The Moon...
Somebody, Anybody, H E L P!
People of Pervia Unite!!!!
Special Delivery...
Old Game...
The Red Pill...
Fuck These...
Confessions of a Call Screener...
Get There...


Comments:

post a comment!

ValentineGirl214

Aug 4 @ 8:38PM  
I told you not to, but Thank You Very Much!!!
Ewe_Wish

Aug 4 @ 8:42PM  
You could always send him this pudge




PrincessKissy

Aug 4 @ 8:54PM  
Again... I ask.... Wanna fuck?
jezzarae

Aug 4 @ 8:59PM  
..... Hey take the hint.







ShadowsAngel

Aug 4 @ 9:01PM  
Val... is some cumstain on the ass of a babboon harassing you? Send him my direction... I'm spoiling for a fight and I already got the can of whoop ass open.
Pudge2you

Aug 4 @ 9:04PM  
By all means, feel free to send him a link to this with my warmest regards of course.
ValentineGirl214

Aug 4 @ 9:27PM  
Thanks Shadow ~ He was just being his normal Rude Ass Self and left a ignorant comment on my Blog about Income and Pudge here got on his White Horse to rescue me!!! Gotta love men on White Horses!!!!!
Pudge2you

Aug 4 @ 9:34PM  
It's for Nacho, Ash and Fmehrd too....
NightOfOld

Aug 4 @ 10:11PM  

You the man Pudge.
ShadowsAngel

Aug 4 @ 10:11PM  
We all know he's a fuckwit who is completely lacking in brains, balls and intestinal fortitude. Hell, my balls are bigger than his are.
Blueyesprkln

Aug 5 @ 1:07AM  
Here's your kudo as promised Pudge. Keep up the good work and here's a sugar cube for your white horse too. oh and Wanna fuck? Just thought I'd be nice and ask. Feel free to turn me down though. lol I'm a little too old for you darlin, but we do appreciate you being here and the champion of the women.
bentan

Aug 5 @ 3:40AM  
The misogynistic pussy still hasn't turned his awesome firepower on your blog yet. Looks like you scared him a little much. * snickers *
NachoBaby

Aug 5 @ 9:12AM  
The pissant doesn't even open emails sent to it, there's no way in hell it's gonna respond to you, there's only one thing to do... make fun of him in public places! Hey Pudge.. you know how I feel man.. do ya wanna? Oh and one of those square green thingies for you.
Fckmhrdtnght

Aug 7 @ 12:34AM  
Awwwwwwwwwwwww you are too sweet.....

Awesome writing... sorry took so long to read it...




Lady J
Ashinatrix

Aug 7 @ 11:39AM  
Love it Love it Love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Unfortunately,
No one mentioned that the cocksucker youre referring to is bushmaster.........
So I will.........
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER

BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER
BUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTERBUSHMASTER











Hey Pudgie....







LolaLicksLife

Aug 17 @ 9:59PM  
Okay, if I could give all of my kudos to this blog, I would. Genius, Pudge. You really ought to get into writing comedy, satire, etc.
I laughed so hard, I peed myself. I'm sending you the dry cleaning bill.

Love your work, man!

Oh, and just in case you don't have enough pending propositions...wanna fuck?

warmest regards,
Lola
LolaLicksLife

Aug 17 @ 10:22PM  
p.s. I looked up this "BushMaster" character and there are no blogs or forums posts on his profile...

so, some kind soul care to fill me in on the offense?

thanks in advance...

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Do You Know Me?