As a companion to my previous blog about farcical sex, I'm moved now to follow up on SN1's masturbation topic, which has been inexcusably underaddressed.
It's fickle when it comes to women--some do it avidly, some not at all--but there is remarkable constancy in men's predilection for masturbation. It's a compulsion, and that urge is sometimes worth acting on.
But what about the times it's not? I swear... it almost seems designed to frustrate. Suppose you quell the desire to masturbate; you learn to live without it for a while until, after some indeterminate amount of time has elapsed, you realize you're about to explode and can't think about anything else. It fucks with your head. As Mr. Clark said to Sams, "It kills your brain cells, son! It kills your brain cells!" That's what it feels like. After a period like that, acting on the urge to masturbate is almost as much about eliciting relief as it is pleasure. That's a strange emotional mix. To add to that confusion, the compulsion to continue doing it at higher frequency becomes almost inescapable for a time. That's a problem, because not only is it objectively a problematic use of one's time, it often leaves me personally feeling profoundly empty inside, wondering for the rest of the day why the fuck I just did that. If you really up the frequency as a guy, it becomes progressively more painful, which continues to be plagued by the seemingly paradoxical instinct to soldier on and keep doing it. Finally, almost mercifully, the cost of continuing so obviously outweighs the benefit that one can begin to forget about it for the next several days until the cycle repeats itself. Meanwhile, the whole process leaves me pining for actual companionship.
In short, it has it's place, but it certainly has its pitfalls. For me, there's real emotional discord when masturbation consistently substitutes for intimacy. It's also physically draining after only a short while, without the reward that generally accompanies sharing that exhaustion with a loved one. An economist might say there are diminishing marginal returns....
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