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The Getaway? Fuck and dump?

posted 6/3/2007 12:47:03 AM |
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Ok, here's the situation. I've been in a relationship, PURELY sexual- usually he comes, he goes - I cum, I go. lol. But he asked me to spend the night. Yeah.. I'm not really sure where he wants things to go. I've made it painstakingly obvious I can't really do commitment- hey, it's the first thing that turned him on to me. Our whatever you want to call it has been absolutely casual, I like it like that, I don't want to force things to happen, whatever happens will.. but. I realized, outside of sex, he's kind of boring. We don't mesh, I know he can tell, but he always tells me how pretty I am and how his friends would die if they saw him with a 20 year old piece of ass like me. SO, that's where our "relationship" is at. It's come to the point where he wants to spend MORE time together when I don't have that luxury. So, I want to still sleep with him, and he knows it, but afterwards how do I leave without it being awkward???? I don't want to just get off then drive away, I'm not that cruel. So how do I get out of there once the good time has ended? I've told him I want to keep doing what we've been doing, and he's fine with it... BUT, I don't want this guy to feel like he's been used even after he's said it's fine. SO, I'm not asking for advice on how to end the relationship all together, I'm asking how to make a smooth exit (keeping things the way they are)???

What do you guys do after you have sex and you want to get the fuck out of there? One big fuck and dump? Or do you stumble all over your drunk ass, try to put your clothes on, knocking over as much as their crap as possible while trying not to wake them up? Or give those great long kisses and say "I'll call you later" when you have no intention to? lol.

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Jun 3 @ 12:57AM  

Never been in that situation. Hopefully I would only sleep
with someone I cared very deeply for and would not want
to leave or have them leave. Which ever the case may be.
I want to love a person, not just F them and leave.

Jun 3 @ 1:06AM  
I've never been in the situation you are but I have had friend with benefits before so my thoughts are that you have to continue to be completely honest with him and only do what you are really comfortable with. If it makes you uncomfortable to stay then don't do it, it's not worth it.

I had 1 fwb, that outside the bed we had nothing in common so we enjoyed each other in bed and didn't worry about the rest. It works as long as neither of you decide you want more or get attached.

Good luck and trust your instincts.

Jun 3 @ 1:37AM  
hi,just be straight forward and ask him,he may just want you to stay the night figuring to wake up and have sex with you again

Jun 3 @ 3:02AM  
be honest, tell him you have limited time and that you're going to Ocean City for the weekend to get away...( you know where I'm going with this )

Jun 3 @ 3:43AM  
When it's time to part. Play the real "hard bitch", show no emotion, maybe a bit of a compliment for him and a tease for him to look forward to the next time, but make it quite clear that you are going to walk out the door, leave him begging for more......

(obviously I have never been in the situation, so couldn't really comment )

Jun 3 @ 3:44AM  
When I was doing the fuck buddie thing I always told them upfront that I dont do sleep overs. Stopped that problem from happening they always learned to expect me to leave or kick them out after.

Jun 3 @ 6:31AM  
That's a new one - a woman only wanting a guy to be her screw buddy.

Jun 3 @ 7:39AM  
honesty is the best policy........the truth only hurts a little while.......don't give him any hope of going further than you want...........

Jun 3 @ 7:49AM  
i have a guy that does that to me..........i feel hurt when i want it and he says he is busy but when he wants it and i say i am busy he gets mad and won't talk to me for a week

Jun 3 @ 8:13AM  
Just be straight up front......keep it want to stay fine, if you don't..don't....

Jun 3 @ 8:31AM  
I'll email you my number and you can practice this scenario
with me until you are certain it has been perfected.

Jun 3 @ 8:36AM  
Leave a $ 100.00 on the nightstand and leave. The $ 100.00 will soften the blow and tell him how you want the relationship. If you don't have $ 100.00 leave an I.O.U.

Jun 3 @ 10:35AM  
I use time constraints. before hooking up for the day or quicky, I say I only have an hour or so before I have to do something else and would he care to do something. This works great, and gives me an out.

Jun 3 @ 12:04PM  
How should you do it? Like you should handle all of your relationships. With honesty and integrity.

You should just tell him it was nice but you don't think you want to take it any further. You had a good time, and that's all you wanted.

If he is a nice guy, he might be a little hurt or frustrated, but he'll get over it and move on, hopefully a little wiser and more talented from the experience. If he makes up his own perspective and creates a myth about what happened, then that's his issue, not yours.

Jun 3 @ 1:42PM  
Be up front with him. Let him know that right now thats where youre at. If he wants more from you he will have to wait. I myself am looking for pretty much the same as you are. A sex partner in my area to explore some fantasies and fulfill the physical needs we all have. Just be up front first of all. I havent found anyone yet that wants the same as me. I just know right now that I dont have the time for a long term relationship but still have needs. I hope things work out and you still have your needs met. Andrew

Jun 4 @ 7:07AM  
As expected! The blind will continue to lead the blind! Who fucking cares!

Jun 13 @ 1:18PM  
I'm a few days late but wanted to add on.
1) Never spend the night. Makes it easier if you've set a precident.
2) Just say.... I need to go. You don't have to give a reason. Reasons can be debated. Silence can't.
3) If you must give a reason, give one suitably vague that has nothing to do with him. (dont want to hurt his feelings and shut off the supply) At your age, you can very reasonably say..... I'm not ready to consider settling down and spending the night would seem too much like a relationship.
4) You can't sleep unless you're in your own bed. (he might over to stay over with you, though)
5) Buy the record "50 ways to leave your lover" and take notes.

Sep 3 @ 12:58AM  
what would he do if you told him you have a date ? If so can i come over ? lol

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The Getaway? Fuck and dump?