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No "Strings" Attached?

posted 5/14/2007 9:21:17 PM |
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tagged: sex, love
  MonkeyWoman30

I often find this a puzzling statement, to say the least. Whenever you have an encounter with someone, be it emotional, physical, sexual in nature, there are always 'strings' attatched. At least for the somewhat semi-normal human being capable of emotion.

I've not been in love with every lover I've laid with. In fact, I've only truly been in love twice in my life. Once with a remarkable, beautiful woman, and now with a charming, devoted man. Yes, I do think it's the person you love, and not the gender. Of course initial attraction has a lot to do with the joyfully traveling downward we so often call "falling".

I can honestly say, however, that I have truly cared for all of my lovers in some way, shape, or form. My roommate in college was strikingly tall and blonde, and we were never going to be 'best friends forever', but we looked out for each other when the RA was taking names and such. We slept together twice, out of lonliness and boredom more than anything, but I cared about her sexual pleasure nonetheless. If you care at any point about something to do with the other person, then you develop a 'string' I think. Something that ties you to them for this lifetime.. possibly the next. What kind of person wouldn't want their partner (be it a one night stand or a long term realationship) to enjoy their encounter? I've never known a lover that didn't want to be pleased, and please me in return. Maybe I am lucky in that regard. Perhaps I am just one of the lucky few who wouldn't allow myself to be used for other's pleasures. I don't know.

What I'm saying is, the next time someone emails me with "Want to hook up, no strings attatched?" I want them to think about what the end of their 'hook' is on.

Regards,
Kris

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Blogs by MonkeyWoman30:
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Why?
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Why does it have to be so HARD?
No "Strings" Attached?
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Real Women-And Men (IMHO)


Comments:

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sue1968

May 14 @ 9:24PM  
Very well said
Sue
loveableone

May 14 @ 9:28PM  
I agree, VERY well written!!
TheOya

May 14 @ 10:23PM  
Mmmm... well, I think there's nothing wrong with letting yourself be used for another's pleasure, but that has to be with someone that you have a deep bond with. Doing that casually can lead down bad ways, as I've seen beforehand.

That said, as long as you care about yourself as well as the people that you spend your time with, it's hard to be truly hurt.

Ahm... as far as strings go, I've always thought of the way you describe a string in your blog, as more of a "bond." After all, strings are much more easily cut than a bond is. It seems everyone has a different thought behind what "no strings attatched" means too. Some mean it to be friends with benefits, others mean it to be "use and discard like a tissue."

I personally prefer the former.
lewdog

May 14 @ 10:32PM  
You are absolutely right. I'm a guy, and if I like something, you better damn well believe I'm coming back for more!

I tried the NSA thing with a fine beautiful babe. She was up for it as I was. But it was so good for both of us, it turned into something more than 'No Strings' for us. Eventually it was her that woke us both up, about what we agreed on - no strings attached fun.

We've never been together since (about 2 years), but I will always think about her and our time together. I can't speak for her, as I said - 2 yrs. But if she called and needed me there, even for non-sexual reasons, I'd be there in a flash.

So as far as "No Strings Attached"? I don't think i could do it. I tried to, but it didn't work out at all.
dumblonde

May 14 @ 10:40PM  
i agree COMPLETELY!
i think wanting NSA is a copout for being cold and uncaring and to ignore that others have feelings....
mark069

May 15 @ 1:25AM  
I think when people say no strings their hope is that there will not be a serious relationship and the drama that sometimes accompanies it. Sure some strings are likely to form but nothing like what you would have in a full blown romance...
lunanegra

May 15 @ 6:00AM  
I agree.There's always going to be some form of emotional attachment when you get in bed with someone.Some guys think its "not a big deal" when it comes to sex,but what if on the off-chance that you thought this person was cool and wanted to hang out more?I feel the best encounters are the one where you can come back.I really can't stand when its a "no-strings attached" deal.It irritates me.

Anyway,good blog,you're right.
hotbox1968

May 15 @ 12:34PM  
I agree, VERY well written Kris Makes one think

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No "Strings" Attached?