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Bricklayer's accident report (true story)

posted 4/19/2007 5:16:42 PM |
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tagged: joke
  Ang925

Possibly the funniest story in a while. This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board. This is a true story. Had this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure....If you can read this without laughing you have better composure than I have

Dear Sir:

I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six story building. When I completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.

Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor.

Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks. You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 175 lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope.

Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.

Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid asc ent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope in spite of beginning to experience a great deal of pain.

At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, the barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building.

In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs and lower body.

Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.

I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.

I hope this answers your inquiry.

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Comments:

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Ewe_Wish

Apr 19 @ 5:38PM  
Well im not sure if its a true story or not, i heard it many years ago,but it never fails me to laugh my butt off. Thanks for posting it.
Dominus

Apr 19 @ 5:51PM  
This was on mythbusters and they verified that it was true!
Argit01

Apr 19 @ 5:52PM  
No it's not a true story as I heard it as a song about 15 years ago and it was about and Irish bricklayer too. When you work out the velocity and the weight involved along with the height he would have been killed.
bentan

Apr 19 @ 6:06PM  
Mythbusters verified it to be plausible, not true.
drakensoul87

Apr 19 @ 11:36PM  
Yeah i saw that on Mythbusters when it was first on there. They can't say true or not, only if possible, and then how likely it maybe. I haven't been in a bricklaying accidnet myself, but on the topic of construction accidents, I whatched my best friend's father put a nail all the way through the middle of his hand when he thought the nail gun was "off". His dad was pretty tough, and proceeded to rip it out of his own hand, bandage it, and we continued work on the barn.

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Bricklayer's accident report (true story)